MONDO EXTRAS

Parents just don't understand

by Sobell February 23, 2006
Mother, May I Sleep With Danger?

Laurel drives off and Kevin just stands there, as opposed to leaping on the motorcycle right next to him on the driveway. His stalkery little heart is in the right place, but he's really shaky on the execution.

So! You've just fled your creepy obsessive boyfriend -- it's time to unwind and do a little clubbing at the place where your friends play in a bar. Laurel bounces into the bar and into Piney's arms. Heck, he's just thrilled that Kevin hasn't put her off men for life. The two head to the dance floor to boogie to the strains of a band best described as Ron Jovi. Kevin joins them on the dance floor. He declines to get down. He'd rather glower.

When Piney takes a break to go to the little boys' room, Kevin comes in and begins shoving him around as he's doing his business. That Kevin has a real fixation with getting handsy with men in the bathroom. Maybe the whole Laurel thing is overcompensation? Anyway, Piney gets the tar beaten out of him. Kevin then heads back to the bar to hover in Laurel's personal space. She, unsurprisingly, is not thrilled to see him. Kevin grovels some more, and Laurel proves that, for her, it is not so much "No means no" as it is "No means maybe later, because I don't learn from experience and I'm incurious as to what happened to Piney."

When they get outside, Kevin attempts to pitch sweet woo, but he takes a little time out to beat a few drunks senseless, all because they jostled him. Laurel realizes that when it comes to crazy, Kevin is the deluxe combo variety, and she takes off.

Back in Colorado, Unger is arriving at a construction site where workers have found Erin Meadows's skeletal remains. Boy, everything's going pear-shaped for Kevin/Billy at once. Why is the universe picking on him?

Back at the Breakup Shack, Kevin is riding his bike away. Because the music is ominous -- and because he's riding at a speed that the Shriners would consider slow -- we know he's only pretending to go away so he can ambush Laurel when she returns for her stuff in the next scene.

And here she is now. You would think that by NOW, with Kevin having beaten Piney and proven he's harder to shake than a summer cold, she'd have backup with her, but Laurel's not one to learn from experience. As she walks out, she sees him sitting on the hood of the car. Kevin hails her from his alternate reality: "Welcome back." Laurel tells him to cut the crap. Kevin babbles on and on and on, and instead of saying loudly, "What is that buzzing noise? I could have sworn I heard voices. Oh, well…" and getting in the car, Laurel actually pays attention to his twaddle about how now he realizes he needs help. Emboldened, Kevin heads back in the house and grabs two mismatched mugs. He pours some wine in them and pleads that he'd feel so much better if they toasted each other and left as friends. Laurel does not reply that she'd feel so much better if some sniveling meat stick didn't act so needy all the time. The little idiot actually drinks out of the pre-filled glass he offered her. And naturally, that was the glass with the roofies in it.

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Parents just don't understand

by Sobell February 23, 2006
Mother, May I Sleep With Danger?

Laurel drives off and Kevin just stands there, as opposed to leaping on the motorcycle right next to him on the driveway. His stalkery little heart is in the right place, but he's really shaky on the execution.

So! You've just fled your creepy obsessive boyfriend -- it's time to unwind and do a little clubbing at the place where your friends play in a bar. Laurel bounces into the bar and into Piney's arms. Heck, he's just thrilled that Kevin hasn't put her off men for life. The two head to the dance floor to boogie to the strains of a band best described as Ron Jovi. Kevin joins them on the dance floor. He declines to get down. He'd rather glower.

When Piney takes a break to go to the little boys' room, Kevin comes in and begins shoving him around as he's doing his business. That Kevin has a real fixation with getting handsy with men in the bathroom. Maybe the whole Laurel thing is overcompensation? Anyway, Piney gets the tar beaten out of him. Kevin then heads back to the bar to hover in Laurel's personal space. She, unsurprisingly, is not thrilled to see him. Kevin grovels some more, and Laurel proves that, for her, it is not so much "No means no" as it is "No means maybe later, because I don't learn from experience and I'm incurious as to what happened to Piney."

When they get outside, Kevin attempts to pitch sweet woo, but he takes a little time out to beat a few drunks senseless, all because they jostled him. Laurel realizes that when it comes to crazy, Kevin is the deluxe combo variety, and she takes off.

Back in Colorado, Unger is arriving at a construction site where workers have found Erin Meadows's skeletal remains. Boy, everything's going pear-shaped for Kevin/Billy at once. Why is the universe picking on him?

Back at the Breakup Shack, Kevin is riding his bike away. Because the music is ominous -- and because he's riding at a speed that the Shriners would consider slow -- we know he's only pretending to go away so he can ambush Laurel when she returns for her stuff in the next scene.

And here she is now. You would think that by NOW, with Kevin having beaten Piney and proven he's harder to shake than a summer cold, she'd have backup with her, but Laurel's not one to learn from experience. As she walks out, she sees him sitting on the hood of the car. Kevin hails her from his alternate reality: "Welcome back." Laurel tells him to cut the crap. Kevin babbles on and on and on, and instead of saying loudly, "What is that buzzing noise? I could have sworn I heard voices. Oh, well…" and getting in the car, Laurel actually pays attention to his twaddle about how now he realizes he needs help. Emboldened, Kevin heads back in the house and grabs two mismatched mugs. He pours some wine in them and pleads that he'd feel so much better if they toasted each other and left as friends. Laurel does not reply that she'd feel so much better if some sniveling meat stick didn't act so needy all the time. The little idiot actually drinks out of the pre-filled glass he offered her. And naturally, that was the glass with the roofies in it.

Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15Next

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