MONDO EXTRAS

Parents just don't understand

by Sobell February 23, 2006
Mother, May I Sleep With Danger?

Mother and Kevin repair to the living room, where she expresses the hope that Kevin will pass up a lucrative, specialized practice. Kevin replies, "All the misery in this world, I want to use what I learn to help people who need it." Yes, but how many people need someone to tell them how to move bodies in a rag rug? Kevin says his father was on the board of directors at CareShare, and Mother's face brightens visibly. She just happens to have a friend who works there -- Dr. Zola. J'accuse! Kevin's all, Shit! I...should have been more vague in my lying. The music swells, just in case anyone viewing was all, Well, maybe he has turned his life around and entered medical school. Perhaps we misjudged this homicidal drama queen. (The music was giving the complexity of thought processes sparked by this movie too much credit.)

Kevin then sends sales of The Gift of Fear skyrocketing as he talks about how Laurel should be a reporter, because the two of them can work near each other and be together forever and ever and ever and ever. Laurel looks understandably haunted by this prospect. Mother clucks disapprovingly that perhaps Kevin is thinking too far ahead. Kevin looks around for a cutting board before reluctantly answering in words.

We then establish via exposition that Kevin has told Laurel he's an orphan, thanks to a helicopter skiing accident in Austria. He says, "They died doing what they loved." What, crashing?

And now, we hit the first genuinely creepy moment of the movie: Mother and Laurel talking about whether Laurel and Kevin are doing the nasty. The music even swells ominously. Oh, sure, the writers want us to think it's because Kevin's still a nasty little spying creep, but really, it's because Mother's nattering on about birth control in such a way as to make a life of celibacy seem more appealing by the minute.

Then we see them the next morning, Kevin looming over Laurel like Frankenstein's monster as they both lurch across campus. There's some incredibly dull badinage about Mother, and when Kevin runs out of quips, he resorts to his old stand-by: "I just love you so much." Then he attempts to dislocate his jaw, the better to consume her entire head with love.

There's more dreary little talk -- after Laurel tells him her dad died two years after the parentals divorced, Kevin darkly says, "I didn't know my folks that well. They were always away." Or, you know, fictitious. Laurel flippantly tells him they have that in common, since a living, breathing mother is the same as the imaginary dead one spread out over the hills of Austria.

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Parents just don't understand

by Sobell February 23, 2006
Mother, May I Sleep With Danger?

Mother and Kevin repair to the living room, where she expresses the hope that Kevin will pass up a lucrative, specialized practice. Kevin replies, "All the misery in this world, I want to use what I learn to help people who need it." Yes, but how many people need someone to tell them how to move bodies in a rag rug? Kevin says his father was on the board of directors at CareShare, and Mother's face brightens visibly. She just happens to have a friend who works there -- Dr. Zola. J'accuse! Kevin's all, Shit! I...should have been more vague in my lying. The music swells, just in case anyone viewing was all, Well, maybe he has turned his life around and entered medical school. Perhaps we misjudged this homicidal drama queen. (The music was giving the complexity of thought processes sparked by this movie too much credit.)

Kevin then sends sales of The Gift of Fear skyrocketing as he talks about how Laurel should be a reporter, because the two of them can work near each other and be together forever and ever and ever and ever. Laurel looks understandably haunted by this prospect. Mother clucks disapprovingly that perhaps Kevin is thinking too far ahead. Kevin looks around for a cutting board before reluctantly answering in words.

We then establish via exposition that Kevin has told Laurel he's an orphan, thanks to a helicopter skiing accident in Austria. He says, "They died doing what they loved." What, crashing?

And now, we hit the first genuinely creepy moment of the movie: Mother and Laurel talking about whether Laurel and Kevin are doing the nasty. The music even swells ominously. Oh, sure, the writers want us to think it's because Kevin's still a nasty little spying creep, but really, it's because Mother's nattering on about birth control in such a way as to make a life of celibacy seem more appealing by the minute.

Then we see them the next morning, Kevin looming over Laurel like Frankenstein's monster as they both lurch across campus. There's some incredibly dull badinage about Mother, and when Kevin runs out of quips, he resorts to his old stand-by: "I just love you so much." Then he attempts to dislocate his jaw, the better to consume her entire head with love.

There's more dreary little talk -- after Laurel tells him her dad died two years after the parentals divorced, Kevin darkly says, "I didn't know my folks that well. They were always away." Or, you know, fictitious. Laurel flippantly tells him they have that in common, since a living, breathing mother is the same as the imaginary dead one spread out over the hills of Austria.

Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15Next

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See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

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Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

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