MONDO EXTRAS

9:09 -- Anna Faris and Chris Pine present the Breakthrough Performance (Female) nominees: Amanda Seyfried, Ashley Tisdale, Freida Pinto, Miley Cyrus, Vanessa Hudgens and Kat Dennings. And it's Ashley Tisdale! Miley Cyrus looks disappointed. Get used to it, Miley.

9:12 -- Michael Bay and Megan Fox come out, and Tyrese Gibson is screaming stuff at them from the audience. They present a Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen clip. Shia LaBeouf and Fox are hiding in a house as several Decepticons search the entire Egyptian village for them. Shia kills a Decepticon mosquito who comes in through a hole in the wall by tearing it in half, which seems like harsh shit to do to a sentient being. Luckily, the Decepticons immediately find them and start blowing things up around them. In the audience, Shia looks impressed. Gibson is ecstatic.

9:18 -- Commercial Commentary: In a Kia Soul commercial, guys in hamster suits drive Popcorn Man, the show's new popcorn-headed mascot, to the awards. It's creepy and weird, and in no way makes me want to buy that car.

9:20 -- Shia comes out to present Best Fight and clearly goes off-cards for a minute, possibly because he can't read them. The nominees are Hellboy 2, Bride Wars, Dark Knight, Twilight and Pineapple Express. During the Twilight clip they play A-Ha's "Take on Me," which clearly gives them the edge, as they win it. Pattinson and Cam Gargamel. Sorry, Gigandet. ...Actually, I like "Gargamel" better.

9:23 -- In one of the most random pairings of desperation ever, Taraji P. Henson and the cast of The Hangover (minus Zach Galifianakis) introduce Eminem. I love it when rappers have that guy who fills in for them so they can stop rapping to breathe, because it's like they're a rap duo, but they never tell you that guy's name. It seems like he should get a little more credit. Eminem could have suffocated if not for that guy.