9:56 - Commercial: The Real World: New Orleans. Isn't that redundant? Isn't every episode of this show like a particularly drama-filled night at Mardi Gras?
9:57 - Aziz and his Human Giant co-stars Rob Huebel and Paul Scheer do a sketch about stunt kid coordinators, in which kids are slammed into walls and clotheslined by garage doors.
9:59 - Bradley Cooper, Betty White and Scarlett Johansson are on stage to present a Generation Award to Sandra Bullock. Not to Betty White, mind you, who has entertained five generations of young people. Cooper comes up with approximately 57 million nicknames and brags about how much money her movies made last year, while Betty White humorously mixes up her movies and ScarJo has nothing to say. Literally. She declines to speak. I guess that's the joke of why she was out there, since she hasn't done any movies with her as far as I can recall. After a montage of clips of Demolition Man and Practical Magic, Bullock gets a standing O, honors Cooper and White and refutes the press's rumor-mongering before finally asking ScarJo why she's there. Apparently, she's there to fill in for her hubby Ryan Reynolds, and also because she wants to kiss Sandra. They lock lips, and alarms go off at TMZ, causing typewriters to automatically generate a story about Bullock's surfacing lesbian tendencies.
10:10 - Michael Cera, Anna Kendrick, Aubrey Plaza and Kieran Culkin come out to present for Best WTF Moment. Because the clips are apparently too hot for TV, Bill Murray, Betty White, Megan Fox, Isabel Lucas and Ken Jeong don't get the traditional nominee presentation; instead, the presenters swear extensively as they explain how funny/crazy the scenes were. Jeong wins, and manages to curse even as he thanks Bradley Cooper for helping him get through his wife's breast cancer treatments. Now that's a commitment to obscenities.
10:14 - R. Kelly couldn't make it, so Aziz is performing R. Kelly's tribute to Avatar, and it's pretty awful. It's just Aziz telling/rapping the story of Avatar over a beat, and it's kind of painful, but then he sings "Fuck you, BP" three times to end it, and it's kind of cool again.
10:16 - The cast of The Other Guys, come out to present for Best Villain, with Samuel L. Jackson, Dwayne Johnson and Eva Mendes onstage and Will Ferrell and Mark Wahlberg stuck overhead in harnesses. After the stage people and the harness people argue a bit, we learn that Steven Lang, Helena Bonham Carter, Christoph Waltz, Ken Jeong and Tom Felton are the nominees, and Felton wins! Yaaaay Draco Malfoy! He thanks some people as Ferrell and Wahlberg moan about how long he's taking. Dudes -- let Draco Malfoy thank his mom.