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Oscars 2008: Your Oscar-Party Planner

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Oscars 2008: Your Oscar-Party Planner

1. Appoint a union delegate from among your party ranks. Give him or her free reign of your house. No private conversations or interactions between any two partygoers or hosts are permitted without this delegate present. The delegate can even demand to accompany guests during their bathroom or cigarette breaks. This is guaranteed to stir up trouble, and trouble is good for parties. Especially if the show is boring.
2. During the acting awards, encourage your guests to stand on their chairs or your couch with handwritten signage held high.
3. Michael Clayton dartboard. As it's the most "corporate" of the Best Picture nominees, invite your party guild members to take out their aggression in its general direction.
What To Watch Out For: Overtime. If the Oscars run over, guests are free to leave before Best Picture is announced and/or receive an extra goody bag and a half.
Anticipated Budget: You can afford it. You're making more than minimum wage.

Anarchist's Ball
Oscar-Winning Patron Saint: Javier Bardem as Anton Chigurh in No Country For Old Men. (What? You say he hasn't won yet? Oh, how naïve you are. That Oscar is all sewn up, like a gunshot wound stitched shut, without anesthetic.)
Who To Invite: Sally Kirkland, Hilary Swank and Annette Bening, Bai Ling, your favorite party animals.
Dress Code: Anything goes.
Party Length: I hope you don't have to work on Monday.
What To Serve: Meat pies. Orange Tic-Tacs.
From The Bar: Absinthe, to commemorate Moulin Rouge! Hey man, don't get hung up on what year it is. Time is irrelevant.
Suggested Props: A fake pregnancy belly (Juno). A pressurized air cannon (No Country For Old Men). A set of shaving knives (Sweeney Todd). Filthy-minded letters to various party guests (Atonement).
Suggested Party Activities: Encourage use of the props. Sit back and see where the evening takes you.
What To Watch Out For: If you try to control this party, you'll be sweating like Tilda Swinton in a bathroom stall in no time.
Anticipated Budget: Set your money on fire! (If you're only a part-time anarchist, you can always file an insurance claim for damages afterwards.)

Cinephile Shindig
Oscar-Winning Patron Saint: Cate Blanchett as "Katharine Hepburn" in The Aviator.

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Mondo Extra
Oscars 2008: Your Oscar-Party Planner

Episode Report Card
Grade It Now!
YOU GRADE IT
Oscars 2008: Your Oscar-Party Planner

1. Appoint a union delegate from among your party ranks. Give him or her free reign of your house. No private conversations or interactions between any two partygoers or hosts are permitted without this delegate present. The delegate can even demand to accompany guests during their bathroom or cigarette breaks. This is guaranteed to stir up trouble, and trouble is good for parties. Especially if the show is boring.
2. During the acting awards, encourage your guests to stand on their chairs or your couch with handwritten signage held high.
3. Michael Clayton dartboard. As it's the most "corporate" of the Best Picture nominees, invite your party guild members to take out their aggression in its general direction.
What To Watch Out For: Overtime. If the Oscars run over, guests are free to leave before Best Picture is announced and/or receive an extra goody bag and a half.
Anticipated Budget: You can afford it. You're making more than minimum wage.

Anarchist's Ball
Oscar-Winning Patron Saint: Javier Bardem as Anton Chigurh in No Country For Old Men. (What? You say he hasn't won yet? Oh, how naïve you are. That Oscar is all sewn up, like a gunshot wound stitched shut, without anesthetic.)
Who To Invite: Sally Kirkland, Hilary Swank and Annette Bening, Bai Ling, your favorite party animals.
Dress Code: Anything goes.
Party Length: I hope you don't have to work on Monday.
What To Serve: Meat pies. Orange Tic-Tacs.
From The Bar: Absinthe, to commemorate Moulin Rouge! Hey man, don't get hung up on what year it is. Time is irrelevant.
Suggested Props: A fake pregnancy belly (Juno). A pressurized air cannon (No Country For Old Men). A set of shaving knives (Sweeney Todd). Filthy-minded letters to various party guests (Atonement).
Suggested Party Activities: Encourage use of the props. Sit back and see where the evening takes you.
What To Watch Out For: If you try to control this party, you'll be sweating like Tilda Swinton in a bathroom stall in no time.
Anticipated Budget: Set your money on fire! (If you're only a part-time anarchist, you can always file an insurance claim for damages afterwards.)

Cinephile Shindig
Oscar-Winning Patron Saint: Cate Blanchett as "Katharine Hepburn" in The Aviator.
Who To Invite: Friends who have actually seen the movies.

Previous 1 2 3 4Next

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