MONDO EXTRAS

I'm The Man In The Box

by Stee November 9, 2005
Profit: Pilot

Night. Office. Profit creep-overs a great line: "When you want someone to love you, open your heart. When you want someone obsessed with you, close it." Profit calls Pete's Wife and tells her he needs to see her. She doesn't not object.

Later. Profit is in the bathroom and Joanne skulks around his office, also wearing leather gloves. This show must have had a serious product placement deal with Isotoner. Profit emerges from the bathroom. Jack stops him, clearly buying Joanne more time, but saying that he came up late because he's afraid he'd be kicked out during the day. Profit agrees that he would. Jack apologizes for the things he said earlier, saying that now he knows Profit didn't "leak the memo." Jack says that maybe he'll be coming back to work, and thanks Profit for letting him clear the air. Jack walks off, Profit staring at him suspiciously. Or he thinks Jack's booty looks kicky in those Dockers.

Profit takes a romantic walk outside by a fountain with Pete's Wife. He apologizes for having sounded so urgent on the phone, but she says that Pete is usually passed out by 9:30 anyway, so it doesn't matter. In other words: "Your creepy voice gets me hot and let's have an affair because my boozy, penis-cream-applying husband won't know the difference." Profit proceeds to pull the single greatest girl-wooing technique of all time. It's really a high degree of difficulty maneuver but one, like Mr. Miyagi's Crane Technique, against which there is no defense: he tells her that he can't see her anymore: "It hurts to much to be around [her]." He sniffles a little, and then dramatically turns away from her. And...she is hooked. It should be said that this maneuver only works if said girl has a shitty boyfriend and thinks you're trying to be the bigger man by walking away.

Jack and Joanne arrive at her houseboat, where he calls her on failing to offer him a drink. Joanne says that she's uncomfortable being at their houseboat o' love with him again, après l'affaire. I can't tell if Joanne is a bad actress, or a really good one. Her delivery is weird. As is her throaty voice. And that trench coat. She's dressed up like she's going to a Halloween party as Columbo. They have a drink.

And one, two, three...Pete's Wife runs after Profit, yelling, "Jim! Wait!" Done and done. She clutches him and they start making out. I'm telling you: difficult to pull off, but guaranteed results. (Not that I've ever tried it.)

Joanne and Jack drink and look at the World Wide Web on their Houseboat Dial-Up, via The First Laptop Ever Invented. Seriously, it's the size of an encyclopedia. Joanne notices that if Profit is paying Mama off, his bank accounts don't reflect it. Joanne says that everything about Profit is a little too neat, like "the perfect lie." She suggests that they go after Mama; she's not perfect. Decidedly.

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I'm The Man In The Box

by Stee November 9, 2005
Profit: Pilot

Night. Office. Profit creep-overs a great line: "When you want someone to love you, open your heart. When you want someone obsessed with you, close it." Profit calls Pete's Wife and tells her he needs to see her. She doesn't not object.

Later. Profit is in the bathroom and Joanne skulks around his office, also wearing leather gloves. This show must have had a serious product placement deal with Isotoner. Profit emerges from the bathroom. Jack stops him, clearly buying Joanne more time, but saying that he came up late because he's afraid he'd be kicked out during the day. Profit agrees that he would. Jack apologizes for the things he said earlier, saying that now he knows Profit didn't "leak the memo." Jack says that maybe he'll be coming back to work, and thanks Profit for letting him clear the air. Jack walks off, Profit staring at him suspiciously. Or he thinks Jack's booty looks kicky in those Dockers.

Profit takes a romantic walk outside by a fountain with Pete's Wife. He apologizes for having sounded so urgent on the phone, but she says that Pete is usually passed out by 9:30 anyway, so it doesn't matter. In other words: "Your creepy voice gets me hot and let's have an affair because my boozy, penis-cream-applying husband won't know the difference." Profit proceeds to pull the single greatest girl-wooing technique of all time. It's really a high degree of difficulty maneuver but one, like Mr. Miyagi's Crane Technique, against which there is no defense: he tells her that he can't see her anymore: "It hurts to much to be around [her]." He sniffles a little, and then dramatically turns away from her. And...she is hooked. It should be said that this maneuver only works if said girl has a shitty boyfriend and thinks you're trying to be the bigger man by walking away.

Jack and Joanne arrive at her houseboat, where he calls her on failing to offer him a drink. Joanne says that she's uncomfortable being at their houseboat o' love with him again, après l'affaire. I can't tell if Joanne is a bad actress, or a really good one. Her delivery is weird. As is her throaty voice. And that trench coat. She's dressed up like she's going to a Halloween party as Columbo. They have a drink.

And one, two, three...Pete's Wife runs after Profit, yelling, "Jim! Wait!" Done and done. She clutches him and they start making out. I'm telling you: difficult to pull off, but guaranteed results. (Not that I've ever tried it.)

Joanne and Jack drink and look at the World Wide Web on their Houseboat Dial-Up, via The First Laptop Ever Invented. Seriously, it's the size of an encyclopedia. Joanne notices that if Profit is paying Mama off, his bank accounts don't reflect it. Joanne says that everything about Profit is a little too neat, like "the perfect lie." She suggests that they go after Mama; she's not perfect. Decidedly.

Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20Next

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Get the most of your experience.
Share the Snark!

See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

Share your activity with your friends to Facebook's News Feed, Timeline and Ticker.

Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

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