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America: You Aren't Safe

Fox Executive #1: Well, we did it! High-fives!

Fox Executive # 2: Yeah!

Fox Executive # 3: Booyah!

1: ...You guys don't know what we're celebrating, do you.

2: We got Wayne Brady back on network TV?

3: We didn't greenlight Cavemen?

1: Certainly, we all should be very proud of both those things. But I actually was talking about the Emmys.

3: The what-ies?

2: What in the HELL could the Emmys possibly have to do with Fox?

1: Hey! We win them sometimes! 24!

2: Not this year.

3: I know, right?

1: It's aaaaaaall about next year, when Kelsey Grammer is definitely going to get nominated for Back To You.

2 & 3: [silence]

1: Right?

2 & 3: Totally!

1: That's what I thought you said.

2: So...the Emmys?

1: Oh, right. They're going to be on Fox this year!

2: Shut the fuck up.

1: No, really!

3: The Emmys. On Fox. Network.

1: Did I stutter?

2: I'm just surprised. NBC has the Golden Globes, ABC has the Oscars; we don't even get People's Choice! You know, there's this idea -- and I'm not saying I subscribe to it -- that Fox isn't really the mark of quality.

1: Yeah, I know.

3: I hear it all the time: "Oh, your shows are crap! Oh, whenever you do fall ass-backwards into something decent, you screw it up! When's Andy Richter Controls The Universe coming back?"

1: Right, but--

2: My maid is like, "Oh, Señor Dos, I was such a fan of the Briscoe County Jr., but now your shows are all caca!"

1: Yeah, that was a good one, but--

3: I tried to get my seven-year-old into Family Guy, but he's like, "It's so dumb!"

1: I GET IT. But that's why getting the Emmy broadcast is such a big deal for us! It's our chance to show that Fox is good for more than trash and pap! Let's demonstrate our capacity to class it up!

2: I love it!

3: Let's get gold-plated toilet seats!

1: That's a great start, but I'm not sure there would be a way to incorporate those into the broadcast.

1 2 3 4Next

Mondo Extra

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Mondo Extra
Seacrest In!

Episode Report Card
Grade It Now!
YOU GRADE IT
America: You Aren't Safe

Fox Executive #1: Well, we did it! High-fives!

Fox Executive # 2: Yeah!

Fox Executive # 3: Booyah!

1: ...You guys don't know what we're celebrating, do you.

2: We got Wayne Brady back on network TV?

3: We didn't greenlight Cavemen?

1: Certainly, we all should be very proud of both those things. But I actually was talking about the Emmys.

3: The what-ies?

2: What in the HELL could the Emmys possibly have to do with Fox?

1: Hey! We win them sometimes! 24!

2: Not this year.

3: I know, right?

1: It's aaaaaaall about next year, when Kelsey Grammer is definitely going to get nominated for Back To You.

2 & 3: [silence]

1: Right?

2 & 3: Totally!

1: That's what I thought you said.

2: So...the Emmys?

1: Oh, right. They're going to be on Fox this year!

2: Shut the fuck up.

1: No, really!

3: The Emmys. On Fox. Network.

1: Did I stutter?

2: I'm just surprised. NBC has the Golden Globes, ABC has the Oscars; we don't even get People's Choice! You know, there's this idea -- and I'm not saying I subscribe to it -- that Fox isn't really the mark of quality.

1: Yeah, I know.

3: I hear it all the time: "Oh, your shows are crap! Oh, whenever you do fall ass-backwards into something decent, you screw it up! When's Andy Richter Controls The Universe coming back?"

1: Right, but--

2: My maid is like, "Oh, Señor Dos, I was such a fan of the Briscoe County Jr., but now your shows are all caca!"

1: Yeah, that was a good one, but--

3: I tried to get my seven-year-old into Family Guy, but he's like, "It's so dumb!"

1: I GET IT. But that's why getting the Emmy broadcast is such a big deal for us! It's our chance to show that Fox is good for more than trash and pap! Let's demonstrate our capacity to class it up!

2: I love it!

3: Let's get gold-plated toilet seats!

1: That's a great start, but I'm not sure there would be a way to incorporate those into the broadcast.

1 2 3 4Next

Mondo Extra

Comments

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