The Unusuals Premiere
At the crime scene, on a baseball diamond in a park, Shraeger and Walsh look sad. So sad that we immediately leave there and go to the briefing room, where Sgt. Brown introduces Alvarez, who is apparently leading the meeting. Delahoy coughs "hairpiece." Alvarez asks Cole if he made progress with the witnesses, and he's gotten a sketch of an Asian man with a scar seen leaving the park. This lead is acknowledged, then apparently ignored until later in the show. When Walsh disagrees with Alvarez's methods, he finds out that Alvarez is primary, because he was at the autopsy when the commissioner showed up. Walsh says the murder was personal (to Kowalski, not to him), and storms out. Brown asks if Delahoy is crying, Delahoy gets mad and pounds the desk. Is he actually crying? About the tumor? Or is the tumor affecting his brain?
No time for that, because Banks and Delahoy are suddenly rolling up on a guy in a bowtie and baseball hat, who's wrestling with a cat in an alley. He bolts, and they chase him down the street and into the subway. They all jump the turnstiles, and Delahoy follows him downstairs, where they both jump down onto the tracks. As the perp jumps up onto the next platform, Delahoy looks up to see a train bearing down on him and freezes. Banks thought ahead, and is tasering the perp on the other platform, but when he looks for Delahoy, he sees him still on the tracks, eyes closed, literally one inch from the barely stopped train. Delahoy looks embarrassed. Commercials.
Shraeger descends the stairs, passing Beaumont who's leading the hot dog perp back up. Beaumont asks if she came from Vice, and tells her about the 2nd Precinct. We get that Alvarez talks about himself in the third person, Banks wears a bullet-proof vest to bed and Delahoy just named his spectacular mustache. Shraeger asks about Walsh, and Beaumont says he won't stare at your breasts, although she'd like him to. Whether it's just breastly pride or the hots, it's too early to tell. Shraeger gets a call from her mother asking if she'll be at her father's birthday that night. While she's on the phone, Shraeger sees Alvarez canoodling with a woman on the stairs and panics. She starts to sneak away, but the woman spots her. When Shraeger plays dumb, the obviously upper-crust-sounding woman says they went to school together, and asks what she's doing there. She can't believe that she's a cop, and can't wait to tell Alvarez she knows her. Shraeger immediately drags her into the nearest bathrooom, where I think she's going to give the woman a good stomping to shut her up but good, but then says the woman can't tell anybody. She even threatens to tell Alvarez that the woman went to the prom with the entire lacrosse team. They 90210 at each other a little -- "Bitch!" Slut!" -- and Shraeger says she's glad they understand each other, and leaves.