MONDO EXTRAS

The 2002 MTV Movie Awards

Stee: This is the only place where Macy Gray is still being played anywhere in America. Man, the phrase "Jason Biggs is on Broadway" is perhaps the saddest sentence ever said anywhere.
Pamie: Isn't this dude almost done? Like, forever done?
Ray: He has monkey ears.

Kate Beckinsale and Nicolas Cage. Both look absolutely ridiculous. Someone tell Kate Beckinsale to close her legs. We assume it's way too late for that advice. She totally can't tell which lines are hers and which are his, and Nicolas Cage has become a complete parody of himself. Best Action Sequence: Pearl Harbor, The Fast & the Furious, Black Hawk Down, The Lord of the Rings.

Ray: Who is that?
Stee: It's Kate Beckinsale after the weird Jennifer Grey thing she did to her face.
Pamie: Look at her lips.
Stee: And why is Andrew Dice Clay on stage right now? Seriously, he looks just like him.
Pamie: It's the scrunchy face thing he's doing now.
Stee: "Hickory Dickory Dock. Kate Beckinsale was sucking my cock."
Pamie: "Oh! It's serendipity! Oh!"
Stee: You know what the Best Action Sequence was from when we saw Rings?
Pamie: My snoring?
Stee: Exactly. "Let the pillows hit the floor. Let the pillows hit the floor."
Pamie: Pearl Harbor? Wasn't that three years ago?!

Pearl Harbor wins. Michael Bay walks up to get his award as Ben Affleck shakes his head. He's so drunk he can't remember that he didn't direct the movie. Michael Bay boasts that he made Nick Cage an action star. Nick simply points in response. The director says he's sharing his award with his cast, crew, and the three thousand people who lost their lives at Pearl Harbor. Sure he is.

Seann William Scott tells us he thought he was going to throw up when he heard "two dudes kissing." Ass.

We are all very excited about Blue Crush and not just because we finally get to see Bella mostly naked.

Stee: This is going to be great.
Pamie: I can't wait to see this.
Stee: Me neither.
Ray: Oh, c'mon!
Stee: Chicks surfing! What else do you need.
Pamie: And Bananarama playing the backgroud.
Stee: Chicks in bikinis! What else do you need in a movie?

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The 2002 MTV Movie Awards Pamie: Isn't this dude almost done? Like, forever done? Ray: He has monkey ears. Kate Beckinsale and Nicolas Cage. Both look absolutely ridiculous. Someone tell Kate Beckinsale to close her legs. We assume it's way too late for that advice. She totally can't tell which lines are hers and which are his, and Nicolas Cage has become a complete parody of himself. Best Action Sequence: Pearl Harbor, The Fast & the Furious, Black Hawk Down, The Lord of the Rings.
Ray: Who is that? Stee: It's Kate Beckinsale after the weird Jennifer Grey thing she did to her face. Pamie: Look at her lips. Stee: And why is Andrew Dice Clay on stage right now? Seriously, he looks just like him. Pamie: It's the scrunchy face thing he's doing now. Stee: "Hickory Dickory Dock. Kate Beckinsale was sucking my cock." Pamie: "Oh! It's serendipity! Oh!" Stee: You know what the Best Action Sequence was from when we saw Rings? Pamie: My snoring? Stee: Exactly. "Let the pillows hit the floor. Let the pillows hit the floor." Pamie: Pearl Harbor? Wasn't that three years ago?!
Pearl Harbor wins. Michael Bay walks up to get his award as Ben Affleck shakes his head. He's so drunk he can't remember that he didn't direct the movie. Michael Bay boasts that he made Nick Cage an action star. Nick simply points in response. The director says he's sharing his award with his cast, crew, and the three thousand people who lost their lives at Pearl Harbor. Sure he is. Seann William Scott tells us he thought he was going to throw up when he heard "two dudes kissing." Ass. We are all very excited about Blue Crush and not just because we finally get to see Bella mostly naked.
Stee: This is going to be great. Pamie: I can't wait to see this. Stee: Me neither. Ray: Oh, c'mon! Stee: Chicks surfing! What else do you need. Pamie: And Bananarama playing the backgroud. Stee: Chicks in bikinis! What else do you need in a movie? Pamie: It's called "July," Ray. Stee: God! Pamie: Hee. I think I just proved I wasn't cool in high school. Stee: We sound like we work for Universal. Pamie: "You're not going to see Blue Crush? Ew, like, what's wrong with you?"

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