24
It was supposed to be the greatest day of Charles Logan's presidency. But his historic signing of an anti-terrorism treaty with Russia was very nearly derailed by a hostage crisis and the assassination of Logan's predecessor, David Palmer. Whoever could be behind such dastardly sabotage of Logan's legacy? Well, as we found out later that day, it was Logan himself. Because he's just. That. Evil.

Logan's day was further complicated by the abrupt reappearance of Jack Bauer, the former CTU agent whose murder he'd tacitly condoned eighteen months before to keep him out of the hands of the Chinese government. Supposedly only four people previously knew Jack was still alive, Palmer being one of them. Jack came out of hiding to investigate and avenge Palmer's murder. With a little help from his friends who survived (and Michelle, Edgar, and Tony, who didn't), he not only untangled a vast conspiracy that reached all the way to the Oval Office, but personally brought down all of its principal perpetrators, up to and including Logan. All while people were constantly trying to kill him with bullets, bombs, poison gas, and fighter planes, and all in less than twenty-four hours.

Jack's reward for this superhuman feat: winding up in the vengeful clutches of the Chinese after all. Is there no justice in the world? Yes, there is, but its sole champion is currently sailing across the Pacific Ocean. Bummer. -- M. Giant

Alias
Oh, last season of Alias, how long we have waited for thee. Not that we didn't love you, but really, your shark-jumping days had long since passed us by and it was time to take the wacky wig off once and for all and head to your retirement safe house in the hills.

As final seasons go, it wasn't the most awe-inspiring, but the characters we know and love were all present and accounted for, and a gaggle of newbies showed up long enough to distract us from the gargantuan plot holes and rampant character assassinations hindering our viewing pleasure. Vaughn turned out to be some guy named André Michaux, and he and his waifish secret partner, Élodie Bouchez, were on the search for yet another evil underground organization known as Prophet Five. What, were all the names beginning with "The" taken? Vaughn got shot a mactrillion times but still managed to show up alive at the eleventh hour, even though he'd had every single internal organ perforated by little shiny things known as "bullets." Sloane went from good to bad to good back to bad so many times that, by the final episode, we were so irritated that we almost climbed through the TV and slammed him with Rambaldi's tombstone ourselves. The two new characters had the potential to be truly awful, but they were fortunate enough to be played by Rachel Nichols and Balthazar Getty who, luckily, didn't suck at all. Plus? Balthazar Getty's kind of hot, so he had that going for him, which is nice.

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24
It was supposed to be the greatest day of Charles Logan's presidency. But his historic signing of an anti-terrorism treaty with Russia was very nearly derailed by a hostage crisis and the assassination of Logan's predecessor, David Palmer. Whoever could be behind such dastardly sabotage of Logan's legacy? Well, as we found out later that day, it was Logan himself. Because he's just. That. Evil.

Logan's day was further complicated by the abrupt reappearance of Jack Bauer, the former CTU agent whose murder he'd tacitly condoned eighteen months before to keep him out of the hands of the Chinese government. Supposedly only four people previously knew Jack was still alive, Palmer being one of them. Jack came out of hiding to investigate and avenge Palmer's murder. With a little help from his friends who survived (and Michelle, Edgar, and Tony, who didn't), he not only untangled a vast conspiracy that reached all the way to the Oval Office, but personally brought down all of its principal perpetrators, up to and including Logan. All while people were constantly trying to kill him with bullets, bombs, poison gas, and fighter planes, and all in less than twenty-four hours.

Jack's reward for this superhuman feat: winding up in the vengeful clutches of the Chinese after all. Is there no justice in the world? Yes, there is, but its sole champion is currently sailing across the Pacific Ocean. Bummer. -- M. Giant

Alias
Oh, last season of Alias, how long we have waited for thee. Not that we didn't love you, but really, your shark-jumping days had long since passed us by and it was time to take the wacky wig off once and for all and head to your retirement safe house in the hills.

As final seasons go, it wasn't the most awe-inspiring, but the characters we know and love were all present and accounted for, and a gaggle of newbies showed up long enough to distract us from the gargantuan plot holes and rampant character assassinations hindering our viewing pleasure. Vaughn turned out to be some guy named André Michaux, and he and his waifish secret partner, Élodie Bouchez, were on the search for yet another evil underground organization known as Prophet Five. What, were all the names beginning with "The" taken? Vaughn got shot a mactrillion times but still managed to show up alive at the eleventh hour, even though he'd had every single internal organ perforated by little shiny things known as "bullets." Sloane went from good to bad to good back to bad so many times that, by the final episode, we were so irritated that we almost climbed through the TV and slammed him with Rambaldi's tombstone ourselves. The two new characters had the potential to be truly awful, but they were fortunate enough to be played by Rachel Nichols and Balthazar Getty who, luckily, didn't suck at all. Plus? Balthazar Getty's kind of hot, so he had that going for him, which is nice.

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17Next