MONDO EXTRAS

I'll Have A Shoe Christmas Without You

by Mr. Sobell December 15, 2006
The Christmas Shoes For my mama, please
It's Christmas Eve, and these shoes are just her size
Could you hurry, sir?
Daddy says there's not much time
You see, she's been sick for quite a while
And I know these shoes will make her smile
And I want her to look beautiful
If Mama meets Jesus tonight

"Mom," Nathan says, after that stirring musical interlude. "I bought you these shoes. To wear in heaven." Somewhere, a Sunday School teacher did a very poor job explaining to young children exactly what carry-on items people take with them to the Happy Hunting Ground. Nevertheless, a positively beatific Maggie is suitably touched. While the Andrews are saying goodbye inside the house, outside Rob Lowe is trying to salvage his sinking ship of a marriage by showing up just in time to sing a halting version of "Silent Night" and have his praises sung by one of the farmers who just happens to be in attendance. "He's been burning the midnight oil, and that's hard," the farmer says. "But we'd be lost without him. Your husband has given us hope this Christmas." Perhaps, Mrs. Rob Lowe seems to be thinking, my husband isn't such an unrepentant dick after all. Anyhow, Rob Lowe professes his love for his wife! She can go back to school and get her teaching credential. Rob Lowe doesn't want to move to that big, expensive house after all. It's a happy ending for everyone! Except for Maggie, who died while all that was taking place.

Lucky her.

Anyhow, we're back in the present day, and the changed man that is Rob Lowe is back at his mother's grave site, reading that note she wrote him all those years ago. ("Dear son: Please don't be such a raging tool. Or I'll haunt you from beyond the grave. Spookily yours, Mom.") That task having been completed, Rob Lowe turns to leave the cemetery, crossing paths once more with the Red-Sox-cap-wearing stranger from the first scene. Say... Nathan wore a cap like that... you don't suppose he grew up to be... ? Yes, actually. Yes, he did. Because as has already been established in this story, no matter what twists and turns life takes, these two characters will keep crossing paths until the both of them are toothless old men.

So what did we learn from all this, people? Besides the fact that Rob Lowe was kind of a jerk. Or that a garden-variety act of kindness is apparently enough to build a 93-minute movie around these days. Or that if you're going to leave The West Wing because Martin Sheen gets all the good scenes, you better have some good alternative projects lined up. Well, for the answer to that question, I think I'll turn the floor over to my good friend Rob Lowe, to give us one last departing thought via voice-over: "If we're open to it, the smallest of miracles can change our lives. "A laughing child. A pot roast dinner. A car that needs fixing. Even a pair of shoes." Or a cheesy TV movie -- that works pretty well too.

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I'll Have A Shoe Christmas Without You

by Mr. Sobell December 15, 2006
The Christmas Shoes For my mama, please
It's Christmas Eve, and these shoes are just her size
Could you hurry, sir?
Daddy says there's not much time
You see, she's been sick for quite a while
And I know these shoes will make her smile
And I want her to look beautiful
If Mama meets Jesus tonight

"Mom," Nathan says, after that stirring musical interlude. "I bought you these shoes. To wear in heaven." Somewhere, a Sunday School teacher did a very poor job explaining to young children exactly what carry-on items people take with them to the Happy Hunting Ground. Nevertheless, a positively beatific Maggie is suitably touched. While the Andrews are saying goodbye inside the house, outside Rob Lowe is trying to salvage his sinking ship of a marriage by showing up just in time to sing a halting version of "Silent Night" and have his praises sung by one of the farmers who just happens to be in attendance. "He's been burning the midnight oil, and that's hard," the farmer says. "But we'd be lost without him. Your husband has given us hope this Christmas." Perhaps, Mrs. Rob Lowe seems to be thinking, my husband isn't such an unrepentant dick after all. Anyhow, Rob Lowe professes his love for his wife! She can go back to school and get her teaching credential. Rob Lowe doesn't want to move to that big, expensive house after all. It's a happy ending for everyone! Except for Maggie, who died while all that was taking place.

Lucky her.

Anyhow, we're back in the present day, and the changed man that is Rob Lowe is back at his mother's grave site, reading that note she wrote him all those years ago. ("Dear son: Please don't be such a raging tool. Or I'll haunt you from beyond the grave. Spookily yours, Mom.") That task having been completed, Rob Lowe turns to leave the cemetery, crossing paths once more with the Red-Sox-cap-wearing stranger from the first scene. Say... Nathan wore a cap like that... you don't suppose he grew up to be... ? Yes, actually. Yes, he did. Because as has already been established in this story, no matter what twists and turns life takes, these two characters will keep crossing paths until the both of them are toothless old men.

So what did we learn from all this, people? Besides the fact that Rob Lowe was kind of a jerk. Or that a garden-variety act of kindness is apparently enough to build a 93-minute movie around these days. Or that if you're going to leave The West Wing because Martin Sheen gets all the good scenes, you better have some good alternative projects lined up. Well, for the answer to that question, I think I'll turn the floor over to my good friend Rob Lowe, to give us one last departing thought via voice-over: "If we're open to it, the smallest of miracles can change our lives. "A laughing child. A pot roast dinner. A car that needs fixing. Even a pair of shoes." Or a cheesy TV movie -- that works pretty well too.

Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15Next

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See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

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