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The Elvis-athon: Kissin’ Cousins

Episode Report Card
Sars: D | Grade It Now!
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Playing Possum

Couch Baron: I KNOW.

Sars: Look at that. Motionless in the foreground.

Couch Baron: Nice edit with Real Elvis there! He was carrying the girl on his shoulder, and then, PRESTO! On the ground. ..."Two of you. Just what I needed." Pull up a chair and tell US about it, General.

Sars: So now Elvis has gone with the two cute-girl cousins, while Jody is with the Army guys? Can you explain to me what the hell is going on? Hey, CB: let's jump in a hay pile and then sing a song about it!

Couch Baron: No way, I'm only jumping in a hay pile with TWO chicks!

Sars: I don't think your blocking is awkward enough anyway.

Couch Baron: Notice Osh Kosh declined the opportunity for product placement here.

Sars: I've seen you dance with a wheelbarrow; it wasn't pretty.

Couch Baron: Hey, that wheelbarrow was hot.

Sars: Okay, now The Wig is headed back to base, I guess.

Couch Baron: Elvis chasing a pig. I think that's what the kids refer to as "foreshadowing."

Sars: That and the chickens. Dinner on the wing. If someone offers him peanut butter, we'll know they're onto us. Chickens: call your agent.

Couch Baron: Do you think Elvis's blond cousin also happened to gain three hundred pounds in the seventies?

Sars: Wait, now The Wig is back at the homestead. Given how long they spend on exposition in this movie, it's pretty amazing that I have no idea what's going on at any given time. Now the Jeeps are being swarmed by the cast of The Beverly Hillbillies?

Couch Baron: Oh my God, it's like the hillbilly version of The Handmaid's Tale.

Sars: Or the opening scene of 2001. Actually, Elvis used to kick off his stage show with the music from that scene. It's all a circle of love. Or, in Elvis's case, a sphere.

Couch Baron: Hee. And, "Jezebels"? Wow. So Elvis is the Joey Potter of this piece. Lovely.

Sars: Can't they just hand out little laminated placards with the family tree on it? They've explained the relationship between Elvis and Blondvis like 40 times already and this movie would be a lot better if it came in at 18 minutes.

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Mondo Extra
The Elvis-athon: Kissin’ Cousins

Episode Report Card
Grade It Now!
YOU GRADE IT
Playing Possum

Couch Baron: I KNOW.

Sars: Look at that. Motionless in the foreground.

Couch Baron: Nice edit with Real Elvis there! He was carrying the girl on his shoulder, and then, PRESTO! On the ground. ..."Two of you. Just what I needed." Pull up a chair and tell US about it, General.

Sars: So now Elvis has gone with the two cute-girl cousins, while Jody is with the Army guys? Can you explain to me what the hell is going on? Hey, CB: let's jump in a hay pile and then sing a song about it!

Couch Baron: No way, I'm only jumping in a hay pile with TWO chicks!

Sars: I don't think your blocking is awkward enough anyway.

Couch Baron: Notice Osh Kosh declined the opportunity for product placement here.

Sars: I've seen you dance with a wheelbarrow; it wasn't pretty.

Couch Baron: Hey, that wheelbarrow was hot.

Sars: Okay, now The Wig is headed back to base, I guess.

Couch Baron: Elvis chasing a pig. I think that's what the kids refer to as "foreshadowing."

Sars: That and the chickens. Dinner on the wing. If someone offers him peanut butter, we'll know they're onto us. Chickens: call your agent.

Couch Baron: Do you think Elvis's blond cousin also happened to gain three hundred pounds in the seventies?

Sars: Wait, now The Wig is back at the homestead. Given how long they spend on exposition in this movie, it's pretty amazing that I have no idea what's going on at any given time. Now the Jeeps are being swarmed by the cast of The Beverly Hillbillies?

Couch Baron: Oh my God, it's like the hillbilly version of The Handmaid's Tale.

Sars: Or the opening scene of 2001. Actually, Elvis used to kick off his stage show with the music from that scene. It's all a circle of love. Or, in Elvis's case, a sphere.

Couch Baron: Hee. And, "Jezebels"? Wow. So Elvis is the Joey Potter of this piece. Lovely.

Sars: Can't they just hand out little laminated placards with the family tree on it? They've explained the relationship between Elvis and Blondvis like 40 times already and this movie would be a lot better if it came in at 18 minutes.

Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12Next

Mondo Extra

Comments

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