MONDO EXTRAS

The Scariest Two Hours Ever

by Pamie November 24, 2001
The Facts of Life Reunion
Pamie: It's like everyone's on Kids Incorporated.
Stee: This is the subplot that's supposed to attract the kids.
Pamie: Yeah. Good luck with that.

In the car, the kids are getting totally down. There's no drugs or alcohol or cheap sex. Instead, Jamie asks the kids if they ever think about stuff like, "Who was the first person to put ketchup on French Fries?" Then Sam puts his fists in the air and screams with the rush of power he's gotten from their free thinking. Tisha says she has a great idea.

Tootie is getting drunk with Harper. She says she'd like another drink. Harper says that if he has another drink he'll be singing "God Save the Queen." Tootie screams with laughter. "In Spanish," Harper adds, and Tootie's all, "No you di'in't!" on the floor.

Robert is full, but the French chef isn't finished. Natalie says they have to go because she knows Harper must be "crazy hungry." Blair tells the chef they have to go.

Harper tells Tootie he has to go find Natalie because he has to eat. He leaves.

Natalie runs off as Blair pushes the chef away.

Tootie screams, "Harper! Wait!" from her stool, and nobody bothers to look at her.

Natalie finds Harper in the lobby and starts making out with him. She wants to order room service.

Blair and the French chef are actually engaged in a tug-of-war with Robert as the music tickles our funny bone with its added touches of orchestral humor. Blair falls and is horrified to find out she's broken a nail. Somehow, Raymond can see all of this from the front desk. The chef sits down and panics. He cries.

Natalie tells Harper to get comfortable in his hotel room, and she'll run to the kitchen to get them something to eat. Harper says it'd be nicer if they let someone bring them food. Natalie says she wants to pick out the food and then feed it to him and then let him feed it to her. "Fierce," Harper smiles and makes monkey noises as she pushes him into his room.

Back out in the lobby, Robert tells Natalie that he can tell he's intruding on the reunion. Natalie tries to protest, but Robert insists on leaving the next morning; he says he'll call her on the weekend. Natalie kisses him for some time. "Don't forget to call me," she says.

Pamie: See, what's going to happen is Natalie won't end up with either of the guys and Tootie will get the wild boy and Blair will get a divorce and end up with the old guy with all the money. And Mrs. Garrett with the French Bistro man. That's my prediction.

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The Scariest Two Hours Ever

by Pamie November 24, 2001
The Facts of Life Reunion Pamie: Yeah. Good luck with that. In the car, the kids are getting totally down. There's no drugs or alcohol or cheap sex. Instead, Jamie asks the kids if they ever think about stuff like, "Who was the first person to put ketchup on French Fries?" Then Sam puts his fists in the air and screams with the rush of power he's gotten from their free thinking. Tisha says she has a great idea. Tootie is getting drunk with Harper. She says she'd like another drink. Harper says that if he has another drink he'll be singing "God Save the Queen." Tootie screams with laughter. "In Spanish," Harper adds, and Tootie's all, "No you di'in't!" on the floor. Robert is full, but the French chef isn't finished. Natalie says they have to go because she knows Harper must be "crazy hungry." Blair tells the chef they have to go. Harper tells Tootie he has to go find Natalie because he has to eat. He leaves. Natalie runs off as Blair pushes the chef away. Tootie screams, "Harper! Wait!" from her stool, and nobody bothers to look at her. Natalie finds Harper in the lobby and starts making out with him. She wants to order room service. Blair and the French chef are actually engaged in a tug-of-war with Robert as the music tickles our funny bone with its added touches of orchestral humor. Blair falls and is horrified to find out she's broken a nail. Somehow, Raymond can see all of this from the front desk. The chef sits down and panics. He cries. Natalie tells Harper to get comfortable in his hotel room, and she'll run to the kitchen to get them something to eat. Harper says it'd be nicer if they let someone bring them food. Natalie says she wants to pick out the food and then feed it to him and then let him feed it to her. "Fierce," Harper smiles and makes monkey noises as she pushes him into his room. Back out in the lobby, Robert tells Natalie that he can tell he's intruding on the reunion. Natalie tries to protest, but Robert insists on leaving the next morning; he says he'll call her on the weekend. Natalie kisses him for some time. "Don't forget to call me," she says.
Pamie: See, what's going to happen is Natalie won't end up with either of the guys and Tootie will get the wild boy and Blair will get a divorce and end up with the old guy with all the money. And Mrs. Garrett with the French Bistro man. That's my prediction. Stee: You have secret powers. Which boyfriend has to feed Natalie? Pamie: Both of them.

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