Old-timey campaign music plays. On a campaign bus, Ronnie is charming everyone aboard with a not-very-interesting story.
We cut to an old TV ad where competing gubernatorial (I love that word) candidate Pat Brown is shit-talking Ronnie. He talks about people electing an actor. "You know who shot Abraham Lincoln, don't you?" he asks, to much merriment.
Reagan at the stump. He's doing the Schwarzenegger, saying that having experienced folks in Sacramento is what's wrong with the state government. Nice. There's some cheering, but lots of boos from the back. Some very stereotypical-looking hippies are protesting. One of them throws what looks like a mango at Ronnie. Ronnie catches it. "Well, this thing isn't ripe, and neither are you!" he yells. Ooh, fruit burn. The hippie is like, "Oh my God, I have no response to that!" Reagan says that if he had doubts about his inherent rightness, he just lost them. When he's governor, Reagan says, he's cleaning up college campuses. No fruit for anybody! Ronnie gets a standing ovation from the non-hippies in the room. The old-timey "California here I coooooome" music returns. Remember that Mr. Show sketch with the bullhorn-singing inventors? God, I love that sketch. Sports bra, sports bra!
A college dorm. The closed captioning says that the song "Manic Depression" is playing on the "dorm phonograph." A girl rushes into a communal TV room. Signs for Pat Brown are up on the walls. Patty and her boarding school friends are watching the election night coverage. She's not there with Nancy and Ronnie? People are cheering. Ronnie won by more than a million votes. Patty is crestfallen. "God, we're all screwed," she moans.
A clock strikes midnight. Outside the state capital building, Ronnie is being sworn in as governor. Nancy's mom is impressed that Nancy went from a two-bit actress to first goddamn mother of California. Foul of the mouth! Ronald Wilson Reagan solemnly swears to be the guv'nah. Zeljko asks (but he should already know) why they have to do this at midnight. Satan tells him that an astrologer suggested it to Mommy. She said it had to be right after midnight with Jupiter rising. It's the same time they crown kings. And it had to be somewhere at the capital where there hadn't been an inauguration before. Satan assigns Zeljko to "Mommy Watch" from now on.
Napalm. Soldiers. People marching in the streets. No, it's not a Cher concert. It's 1967. Ronnie is visiting the Berkeley campus. Surrounded by guards, Reagan tells the angry protesters that the state is sick and tired of sit-ins and walkouts. He says that it's time they had a few throw-outs. "Go back to Hollywood, Bonzo!" some guy yells out. Reagan bellows, in a voice that sounds more James Brolin than Reagan, that the people put him there. He doesn't know what drugs the kid is on, but folks are going to obey the rules or get out. More anger. Reagan scowls all the way offscreen.