Stee: Fall! Fall! Bosie: Heh. Stee: I want Mini-Me to win one and have to carry that shit off. Ha. Pamie: Oh, that's not Jennifer Love Hewitt. It's some kid. Do they know that Sandra Bullock's not Liv Tyler? Stee: Isn't she too old for the kids? Pamie: She won last year too for something. For uh... Stee: 28 Days. Pamie: Exactly.Jessica Simpson and Ashton Kutcher come out. Kutcher is in a crappy trucker's hat. They tells us to log on and look at webcams they have, and we see Carrot Top in a shower. We hate Carrot Top. Jessica Simpson awkwardly segues from shower to "sing in the shower" with the Choice Single. "Angel" by Shaggy, "Pop" by *NSYNC, "Survivor" by Destiny's Child, "The Call" by Backstreet Boys. The winner is "Pop." The room goes crazy. They show the blonde kid from the Boys, looking pissed, wondering if A.J. is still drunk. The *N-gay-looking one thanks the audience and Justin for writing the song. They shout out names, totally not caring about anything, and leave.
Stee: Oh, now you just ruined it for us, Bosie.
Pamie: They're gonna win?
Stee: Damn! Damn!
Pamie: Look at that ugly crochet.
Bosie: That's what I said. Her mom makes all her clothes.
Stee: Denim is back! Denim is back!
Pamie: But crochet is never supposed to be back. Who's that grumpy guy?
Stee: That was Travis from Blink 182. What is Kelly saying?
Bosie: She is fucking retarded.
Stee: She is.
Pamie: Did you call her "fucking retarded"?
Stee: Okay. Destiny's Child. That's Beyoncé. Who's that?
Stee: Beyoncé's tired.
Bosie: What? The award is a surfboard?
Stee: That's the trophy.
Pamie: Is that Sarah Michelle Gellar? I mean, is that Jennifer Love Hewitt?
Stee: No. NO.
Pamie: No? Are you sure?
Bosie: Look at that schnozz. I think it is.
Stee: No, I think it's just the kids.
Pamie: I think Jennifer Love Hewitt's been demoted to holding the trophy.
Stee: What's with these nominations?
Pamie: We saw all of these nominees before, remember? When we did Teenapalooza?
Stee: I blocked out Teenahpaloozah, mahn.
Bosie: Miss Congeniality was a good movie. Did you see it?
Bosie: Did you like it?
Stee: No, but I like her.
Pamie: He's lying.
Bosie: I thought it was cute.
Stee: I think she's fancy. Hey, they just said my birthday! Woo! Hwah!
Pamie: How old are you?
Miss Congeniality wins and Sandra Bullock tries to look surprised, and she goes up because we guess she also produced that wonderful film. She tells everyone in the room they're sexy and talented and she babbles that the kids rock and she loves entertaining them and she'd much rather be in Austin, we can tell, smoking dope with Matthew McConaughey.
Stee: Fall! Fall!
Stee: I want Mini-Me to win one and have to carry that shit off. Ha.
Pamie: Oh, that's not Jennifer Love Hewitt. It's some kid. Do they know that Sandra Bullock's not Liv Tyler?