MONDO EXTRAS

We're Too Sexy for This Recap

by Pamie October 28, 2001
The VH1/Vogue Fashion Awards 2001
Stee: They knew what they were doing.
Pamie: Yeah.

Stee: Oh, yeah. You know what John Cougar Mellencamp is?
Pamie: Fast-forward. I have a no-Mellencamp policy in my life.
Stee: You know what past collaborator of John Cougar Mellencamp's I'm about to say so that you have to look up how to spell this person?
Pamie: No! Don't say it!
Stee: N'Da --
Pamie: No!
Stee: N'deglo
Pamie: Stop it! Don't say it!
Stee: N'dedlha Michelle
Pamie: No! India.Arie!
Stee: Me'Shell NdegéOcello.
Pamie: Dammit! Bastard.
Stee: Ha!
Pamie: Okay, now I'm adding the joke into the recap.
Stee: My joke?
Pamie: Where do baby cantaloupes go for the summer?
Stee: This is my joke.
Pamie: John Cougar Mellencamp.
Stee: Congrats.
Pamie: I'm not looking her up, by the way.
Stee: Yes you will.
Pamie: I'm tired.
Stee: Me'Shell NdegéOcello.
Pamie: No. Stop saying it.
Stee: Hee.

Lil' Kim talks about the first time she saw a Versace item. She's introing the next nominee for "Blah of the Year," Donatella Versace. She has "diva qualities," we learn. The video starts, and Donatella says something about looking ahead in fashion and music and we get shots of stars and Bruce and Britney and Madonna and it's over.

Pamie: This is so not over yet. We haven't seen Sarah Jessica Parker or Destiny's Child.
Stee: Who is that?
Pamie: Lil' Kim.
Stee: She's a ho.
Pamie: Yeah.
Stee: Ugh. She's making jokes.
Pamie: Make her stop.

Stee: I think Donatella Versace killed her brother.
Pamie: Oh, that's terrible! We already know who killed him.
Stee: I think he was a patsy. Who's the former head of the UN with those two names?
Pamie: I can't switch from fashion to politics that fast. Which two names?
Stee: Oh, Boutros Boutros-Ghali.
Pamie: You motherfucker. I'm not looking that up either. You are so mean. You wait until next time when you have the transcription part.
Stee: Who did John Leguizamo have to play in Moulin Rouge?

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We're Too Sexy for This Recap

by Pamie October 28, 2001
The VH1/Vogue Fashion Awards 2001 Stee: Oh, Boutros Boutros-Ghali. Pamie: You motherfucker. I'm not looking that up either. You are so mean. You wait until next time when you have the transcription part. Stee: Who did John Leguizamo have to play in Moulin Rouge? Pamie: Shut up! Stop it! Stee: Oh, that's right. Toulouse-Lautrec. Pamie: No! Stop it! Stee: All right. I'm done. Pamie: I could not look them up and Wing would have to look them up. Stee: She wouldn't look them up. Pamie: She would. She'd look them up and fix my hyphens. ["I did, you bitches!" -- Wing Chun] Lenny Kravitz. Again. People stand. Why? He swishes out in his sunglasses and he talks about New Yorkers and being visible and vigilant and intros the "Red Carpet Award." It's Renée Zellweger. The video starts. She says she's curious about the world and has an innate need to fit in and she loves the journey for self-acceptance and not the world's paradigm for what beauty is -- yes, she actually says "paradigm." She comes out with her scary chest. She thanks us and Vogue and says the world of fashion is fun, and she says thanks a lot, and says that "it adds to the experience." What experience? She thanks Vogue and VH1 for having the event so that we can celebrate and something about the "benevolent spirit of its citizens." She leaves.
Stee: Hey, is that Macy Gray up there? Pamie: How is Macy Gray on stage and in the audience at the same time? Stee: Genius! Pamie: Lenny Kravitz is so cool he's not even there. See? He's too cool to be bothered. You can tell by the way he's talking to us. Stee: Renée Zellweger? Aw. Shut up. Pamie: She's such a fashion mogul. Stee: You had me at "You want fries with that?" Because she's white trash. Is that Joey Lauren Adams? Pamie: You really can't tell them apart anymore. You put her and Jewel and Joey in a room they'd all be scaring each other with their screechy voices, squinting around trying to find each other. Stee: Getting caught on Jewel's snaggleteeth. Pamie: What is she winning? Stee: "Red Carpet Award." Pamie: This is retarded. Stee: She really doesn't have any boobies anymore. Pamie: I know. Stee: They put her boobies on her ass, I think. Pamie: It's not an ass, it's just that her spine has to go somewhere.

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