True Beauty Premiere
Billy and Joel (hey! Look what they did there!) step up next, and Cheryl tells Billy that the doctor said he has thin lips but an amazing physique considering his age. Way to serve up a back-handed compliment Cheryl. Nolé tells Joel that the doc says he's as close to perfect as Brad Pitt and in the background Chelsea feigns shock. Minnillo announces that the two beefcakes tied for first place with 95.
Minnillo calls the remaining four up and tells Laura that with a score of 94, she's safe. She then informs Hadiyyah-Lah (Jesus that's an annoying name to type), Chelsea and Julia all lack a certain symmetry in their faces. Chelsea THs that she doesn't give a hell about symmetry, she knows she ain't ugly! Whatever you say, Hatchetface! Minnillo announces that nevertheless, Julia has a score of 91 and is safe. The remaining two each affect exasperated disbelief as Minnillo tells them they'll be facing elimination in the hall of beauty. Hadiyyah-Lah then starts to lose it, saying that "this is stupid anyway," and starting to cry, which is an even worse look for her busted-ass face. Sore loser much?
HL retires to her room and insists that she's not sad, she's pissed because she knows she is beautiful, no matter what that stupid doctor's test says. Paris Hilton can be totally sure that she doesn't have herpes no matter what her GYN says, but that doesn't make it any less true, Miss Thang. CJ tries to comfort her by saying that she has much more than just her looks, which is probably the worst thing you can say to a person who has come onto a reality show the premise of which is evaluating someone's physical beauty. CJ, you fail! Before the commersh, Minnillo teases the final segment, which promises that a final challenge could save one of the two ugliest hos from elimination.
In the spy room, the judges discuss what happened at panel. Cheryl is pissed that HL turned her back on the judges when she got news she didn't like. But Minnillo reminds everyone of Chelsea's bad behavior in the house, and they flash back to her cursing Julia out over the bathroom. Tiegs adds that the fact that she's made enemies in the house doesn't reflect well on her. Nolé says that HL might be more aesthetically pretty, but the fact that she rifled through the files in the doctor's office counts against her. Minnillo, unsurprisingly (because duh, we saw it in the teaser!) says that she thinks they should put the two through one final test to see who ought to go home.