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TWoP Staff Special Achievement Awards

Episode Report Card
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TWoP Staff Special Achievement Awards

Best Advertisement for Converting to Scientology
Some take leaps of faith, others take leaps of couch. Anyone who didn't rush to their nearest L. Ron Hubbard UFO of worship immediately after watching Tom Cruise on The Oprah Winfrey Show is just, well, crazy that's all. -- Keckler

Best Bittorrent Cattle Drive
When is the broadcasting world going to wake up and give us a relatively synchronized worldwide airing schedule? When networks like Canada's Space sit on Battlestar Galactica for months after the original airdates on Sci-Fi, people start turning to internet's backrooms of Bittorrent, Kazaa, and eDonkey to see their favorite shows. Oh, our lawyers wanted me to tell you downloading TV shows from the internet is bad, m'kay? -- Glark

The Cock-a-Doodle-Don't Award
Deadwood's Al Swearengen + Kidney Stones + (Prolonged Direct Probing x Olde Tyme Surgery) = Fear Of One's Own Penis -- Glark

The "This Hairdresser Needs a Dressing Down" Award
Jonathan Antin of Bravo's Blow Out proves that you can be an egotistical, fatuous, pompous, square-headed asshole, and a whiny pussy at the same time. One minute, he's slamming his fists into walls and threatening the head of an industrial design firm, the next he's crying at his therapist's office, wah-wah-ing about how tough the pressure is in his life and how he had problems when he was in school. The minute after that, he's getting angry at his support staff because they sold out their entire line of hair products on QVC because he thinks they should have had more stock in hand. Dude, your sister owns the Pussycat Dolls and you get paid $1,000 per haircut. And you're still complaining? Also, his girlfriend is having his child. We will pray for the safety and well-being of this soon-to-be emotionally damaged baby. -- Omar G

The "I'm In This to Win, Not to Make Friends (Not that Anyone Likes Me Anyway)" Award
She was a slaggy, useless, mean-spirited, drama queeny beeyotch on Project Runway, but her worst crime was really that she was a TALENTLESS, slaggy, useless, mean-spirited, drama queeny beeyotch. There was never one single moment that Wendy Pepper rose above her streaky-ass dye job and made us like her. The fact that every outfit she designed directly pandered to one or more of the judges made us hate her just a little bit more. How she made it to the final three, we'll never know. All we know is, her clothing line looks (and smells) like hard-boiled ass and her daughter looked better WITH the felt-tipped moustache than without. No. Seriously. -- Erin

The "No, Don't Look At My Gut, Look Here!" Award

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Mondo Extra
TWoP Staff Special Achievement Awards

Episode Report Card
Grade It Now!
YOU GRADE IT
TWoP Staff Special Achievement Awards

Best Advertisement for Converting to Scientology
Some take leaps of faith, others take leaps of couch. Anyone who didn't rush to their nearest L. Ron Hubbard UFO of worship immediately after watching Tom Cruise on The Oprah Winfrey Show is just, well, crazy that's all. -- Keckler

Best Bittorrent Cattle Drive
When is the broadcasting world going to wake up and give us a relatively synchronized worldwide airing schedule? When networks like Canada's Space sit on Battlestar Galactica for months after the original airdates on Sci-Fi, people start turning to internet's backrooms of Bittorrent, Kazaa, and eDonkey to see their favorite shows. Oh, our lawyers wanted me to tell you downloading TV shows from the internet is bad, m'kay? -- Glark

The Cock-a-Doodle-Don't Award
Deadwood's Al Swearengen + Kidney Stones + (Prolonged Direct Probing x Olde Tyme Surgery) = Fear Of One's Own Penis -- Glark

The "This Hairdresser Needs a Dressing Down" Award
Jonathan Antin of Bravo's Blow Out proves that you can be an egotistical, fatuous, pompous, square-headed asshole, and a whiny pussy at the same time. One minute, he's slamming his fists into walls and threatening the head of an industrial design firm, the next he's crying at his therapist's office, wah-wah-ing about how tough the pressure is in his life and how he had problems when he was in school. The minute after that, he's getting angry at his support staff because they sold out their entire line of hair products on QVC because he thinks they should have had more stock in hand. Dude, your sister owns the Pussycat Dolls and you get paid $1,000 per haircut. And you're still complaining? Also, his girlfriend is having his child. We will pray for the safety and well-being of this soon-to-be emotionally damaged baby. -- Omar G

The "I'm In This to Win, Not to Make Friends (Not that Anyone Likes Me Anyway)" Award
She was a slaggy, useless, mean-spirited, drama queeny beeyotch on Project Runway, but her worst crime was really that she was a TALENTLESS, slaggy, useless, mean-spirited, drama queeny beeyotch. There was never one single moment that Wendy Pepper rose above her streaky-ass dye job and made us like her. The fact that every outfit she designed directly pandered to one or more of the judges made us hate her just a little bit more. How she made it to the final three, we'll never know. All we know is, her clothing line looks (and smells) like hard-boiled ass and her daughter looked better WITH the felt-tipped moustache than without. No. Seriously. -- Erin

The "No, Don't Look At My Gut, Look Here!" Award

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10Next

Mondo Extra

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