United States of Tara Premiere
"You're late," she deadpans, to which he merely pouts, "You're looking very kuwai tonight, Katie-chung." Oh, god, not one of those Japanophile freakazoids. He asks why she didn't text him back earlier, and she explains that things were cuckoo at her house. She reminds him casually about how her mom has multiple personalities and says that one of them is their age. How. Ironic. He asks if she goes around acting like a teenager and she says that actually she's pretty lazy so there's not much going around. Sex Robot is all, "That is so messed up!" and Kate gets weirdly defensive, responding sulkily that, "Well, your mom has implants." They argue about the sluttiness of implants and Kate changes gears, saying she's glad her mom is off meds. Sex Robot doesn't care and just warns her not to ignore another text from him because texting is how he shows his love. Yeah he actually said that. They peel out.
Back in the interior of Loonyball Central, Marshall is sipping chai and reading Sybil while listening to jazz when showered and be-robed Tara enters to ask how he's doing and apologize for everything. A not at all heartwarming scene in which he plays the uber well-adjusted kid and she lays it on thick that he's really understanding and great and she knows that it's not easy. It's not really worth discussing.
Tara meanders into her bedroom where Max is laid out watching the History Channel. She gets in bed and Max climbs on top of her. She fends off his advances by saying that she's still getting used to being in her body, and he explains that T got him riled up earlier. Ewwwwwwww times ten. She asks if he did anything with T and he says no, but she pushes him away when he kisses her, saying she can taste "that porno stuff" T wears on her lips. She gets pissed but he maintains that it's hard to restrain himself when T looks just like Tara. Tara's like, "Not exactly like me, I mean she dresses like a whore." Max corrects her, saying that nowadays the kids call them "ho's." Cute. Tara says that she's just going to have to ho it up for Max and runs into the bathroom, returning in a midriff-baring cut-off football jersey and a thong. On the reals, Toni Collette has a bangin' bod.