Luke and Malissa arrive at Luke's dad's house. Luke interviews that it'll be interesting to see how his family reacts to Malissa after meeting Tali. I have a feeling it won't be very interesting at all, though. Malissa is allowed in the house right away, possibly because she's Christian. She's greeted warmly by everyone, who are so happy to see that she is blond-haired and blue-eyed. Mike demands a hug from Malissa, no doubt to get as close as possible to his son's other girlfriend's boobs. Meanwhile, Grandma is so wearing an outfit that Granny wore on The Beverly Hillbillies. She's like straight out of Central Casting! I don't think she's related to Luke at all. They just wanted a kooky old lady to spice things up a bit. While Mike offers Malissa a drink, she clearly does not like Luke's dog, who tries to jump up and say hello. She says she loves beer, and Mike thinks "that's a good sign." Not really, though. He also notes that she has "Irish eyes." I'm guessing that Tali did not have Irish eyes.
Grandma asks Malissa what she likes best about Luke. "He just seems like an all-around great guy," Malissa says. I know lots of people who are all-around great, but I'm not necessarily in love with them. Malissa interviews that she was excited to finally meet Luke's family after hearing so much about them. With that, they sit down to an indoor dinner. But first, they must say grace. "Oh, I love that!" Malissa says, no doubt knowing that this was probably a problem for Tali. "E'erybody say 'amen,'" Mike finishes, and everybody does. No Jews here! Mike asks Luke about the first time he met Malissa, and Luke says she was one of the first girls he saw and she blew him away. He was very attracted to her physically and now is attracted to her personality, too. Supposedly. Malissa says she didn't really come on the show expecting to get a husband out of it. She just did it "for the experience." Yes, reality show contestant is a great résumé-builder. But now she's in the final two and she can't believe it. Once again, Luke wonders if Malissa is here to win the game or to be with him. Mike is clearly smitten with Malissa, and says so in an interview. "Malissa fits perfectly in our family," he says; "it's just a piece of the puzzle that's been missing." A non-Jewish piece, of course. In the backyard with the menfolk, Mike says that he thinks it's a "pretty easy decision" between Tali and Malissa. Luke says it isn't, and Michael speaks up to agree. I like Michael. Maybe Tali can end up with him. Grandma talks to Malissa inside the house and says she really likes Malissa and has no doubt her poor dead husband would, too. That's creepy. "Oh, good," Malissa says. What else can you say to that, really? Malissa tells Grandma that she "cares a lot about" Luke. She didn't say "love" though. She really wants to build a life with Luke. Grandma asks for another hug. Even she wants to get close to those boobs.
Mike says he feels like he's known Malissa his whole life after knowing her for a few minutes. I think Mike wants to marry Malissa. Tali, on the other hand, was harder to get to know and more aloof around everyone. Luke agrees that it takes a while to get to know Tali, but he finds that intriguing and endearing about her. Mike says that "whoever" Luke ends up marrying, it "has to be someone like Malissa." I wonder if he means "someone not Jewish" or "someone Christian like Malissa." Or maybe he just honestly likes her more than Tali. I really can't tell. Luke says his father's logic makes sense, but love doesn't necessarily make sense. His family's input is important, but in the end this is his decision and not theirs. As Luke and Malissa make out on the driveway, Luke interviews that both women are going to meet his mother after all. Ominous music plays that makes me very much look forward to meeting her as well. As Malissa drives away, Luke says he has no idea who he's going to choose.
With that, we return to LA. Malissa and Tali are back in the mansion, and Malissa says it's weird after being gone for the past week. "I was not looking forward to being back in this room with you. No offense," Malissa tells Tali. Tali doesn't even respond, because she's better than that. Malissa interviews that she's feeling very confident after Luke's family obviously liked her better than Tali. Tali interviews that she's worried Luke will choose Malissa because that's who his family wants him to pick. The doorbell rings and both girls run to answer it where they find ... Luke's mom, Faith! And she is wearing a smart pantsuit and is like ten feet tall. She hugs the surprised women hello and interviews that she felt bad about surprising them when they were in their pajamas, because that's awkward. Ha! Way to call out the producer, Faith. Malissa compliments Faith on her beautiful earrings (kiss ass), but Faith is too busy craving some of Malissa's coffee to care. She invites herself in for a cup. While Malissa prepares a mug for Faith, Tali stands back and hopes she'll have a chance to make a good impression on Faith.
Faith and the women sit down at the table and Faith asks them what the first thing they noticed about Luke was. Tali answers for both of them that he was "very good-looking." She hastily adds "and warm" so Faith doesn't think she's shallow. Malissa says Luke is a "very compassionate person," based on how difficult it obviously was for him to have to send women home each week. Malissa says that she's realized how alike she and Luke really are, especially after talking to his father. Except that Faith divorced Mike's ass long ago so I don't know how much stock she puts into any experience Malissa might have had there. Malissa goes on and on about herself and her schoolwork and her month-long "study abroad" trip to Paris. This is the first we're hearing about Malissa's studies. They wanted us to think she was just a waitress, but obviously not. Malissa concludes with a suck-up thank you to Faith for "raising such a great guy." Faith doesn't take credit for Luke turning out to be the way he is, saying she knows lots of great parents who raised shitty kids. She thinks Luke's great guyness is what's in his heart. A slightly deflated Malissa interviews that "Faith had ... uh ... a different way about her than the rest of the family." She doesn't know what Faith is looking for and therefore can't shape everything she says and does to appeal to it.
Faith asks the girls where they're from. Tali speaks up, saying she was born and raised in Israel before moving to New York just four years ago. Faith's smile never wavers. Tali says that aside from an aunt and uncle, her entire family is still in Israel. Faith is very impressed with Tali's independence. I am too. Faith asks Tali what she does for work, and as Tali starts to talk about the fact that she's a model, Malissa excuses herself from the table to check on something she's cooking in the oven. It derails the entire conversation. Mission accomplished! Malissa says that showing one's "nuturing, caring side" to a possible future mother-in-law can't hurt. How about just having that nurturing and caring side and relying on it to show itself on its own? Tali, meanwhile, has to confess that she doesn't have much in the way of cooking skills, so she told Luke that he can cook and she'll do the dishes. Malissa almost stabs Tali in the eye with some tongs. Much to her chagrin, Faith is much more impressed with Tali's ability to get a man to cook for her than Malissa's ability to cook for him. I am really loving Faith. Why couldn't she host the show instead of Emme?
Luke enters the house, also still in his pajamas, and hugs his mom. They all sit around the table and eat breakfast. Luke asks which parent he resembles more. Tali says Faith without a doubt. Malissa says she can see both parents in him. Faith embarrasses Luke by saying that he was such a beautiful baby that everyone thought he was a girl. Malissa says that Luke is still beautiful. "Yeah," Faith says, not buying the suck up act at all. Uh oh! Minefield ahead! Faith just happens to ask Tali if she's religious and, if so,