My Name Is Earl

Episode Report Card
DeAnn Welker: A- | 3 USERS: A+
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Father Figure

Even though Joy told Earl to leave it alone, we all know he just couldn't do that. He heads to Club Chubby, where Randy digs into the buffet. Gross. When they ring Little Chubby's door bell, he sees them with his surveillance camera and greets them by name through the door. Then he opens up and tells Randy not to eat the buffet shrimp, which come from Camden Lake and actually glow in the dark. Randy checks it out, and they do. In Little Chubby's office, there's a wall of TVs, and Randy thinks all of the shows are boring. Chubby says they're not shows, but surveillance cameras, which he has all over town. He shows them what's going on in the kitchen at Chubby's Pulled Pork: A cook grabs a hot dog bun and unzips his pants. Randy narrates the rest for us: The guy puts his real wiener in a hot dog bun. Chubby's all, "Yeah, that's my cook," and explains that he sometimes tricks people into putting mustard and relish on it. Randy would like to keep it on this channel, please.

Earl and Randy sit down, but Randy doesn't stop watching the show. Little Chubby explains this didn't used to be an office, but a butcher shop. He tricked it out and spent all his time here. There's a guy in a glass-doored meat locker asking to be let out. Chubby says he didn't change everything, because sometimes a refrigerated meat locker comes in handy. Then he tells the guy in the fridge that he'll maybe think twice next time before leaning against his car. Earl interrupts, "Uh, Little Chubby?" Little Chubby says he knows what Earl's thinking: Why is he acting like a douchebag again? "Well, there's a simple explanation for that: I'm a douchebag again." Apparently, Little Chubby found out his business was no place for a nice guy. He figured this out by hiring an old lady as a stripper because he was too nice to tell her no. Then she fell and broke her pelvis, and the customers fled.

Earl asks if he just started acting mean, and Chubby says he tried that but was hormonally incapable, so he got a ball transplant. He says you can get any type you want, so he got bull balls, which are huge. He says it's a lot of fun, although all hell breaks loose if a cow lifts its tail. Gross. Chubby lowers the temperature in the fridge to 32 degrees, and then asks why Randy and Earl are here. Randy stammers they just came to show him his new watch. Who knew Randy was the smart one? But Earl tells Chubby that if he's worried he can't have a kid, he can. Chubby says he can have a kid anytime he wants, though it might turn out to be a minotaur. Then he also says that woman said she was on the pill. Earl says he hadn't told him who it was. Chubby says it doesn't matter, but if Earl leaves this alone, he'll leave him alone. If he doesn't leave him alone... he flashes the flask in his waistband. Oops. Then he flashes his gun.

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My Name Is Earl

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