Back at the Crab Shack, Joy's trying to impress Earl with a guy named Phil who does mortgages -- and whom she's slept with. Earl knows Phil, and knows he has a fake arm. He pulls it off, and Joy's horrified, having somehow overlooked it when they slept together. Just then Jason Priestley comes in wearing a preppy striped collared shirt and a backpack. Earl voiceovers that this is his cousin, Blake, who he can't stand ever since their moms took them both to try modeling for a backpack catalog. Earl couldn't keep his eyes open in the photos, so Blake was chosen as the backpack model. Earl's never measured up to him since. Joy says Blake's not here because he's Earl's cousin. He's here because he's in her book. And now Earl realizes Joy can do better than him. Joy walks off to talk to Blake, and Randy tells Earl that it says "Gi-mungo!" next to Blake's name in the book. Blake comes over and tells Earl he looks surprised to see him, like he just found out he boned his wife -- a look Blake gets a lot, apparently. He assumes Earl's still a loser and a thief, and he's still "rockin' the model thing." He struts around with his backpack, looking like an even bigger dork than he already did, as he says this. Earl voiceovers that he has to do something fast since Blake's better than him at everything.
Earl says his motto at that time was to set something on fire when things were bad, so he starts a fire in the bathroom trash can and yells to everyone that there's a fire, and they should run for their lives. But they find out that killer bees await them outside, and they choose fire. Blake tells Joy not to worry; he'll protect her. Earl shuts the bathroom door and actually does light his shirt on fire. We get a commercial. Will we ever know if Earl survives the bathroom fire?
Back from break, we see that he did survive. He's now sitting at the bar watching the killer bees on the news and turning occasionally to watch Joy "canoodle" with Blake. Earl tells us that Blake's backpack is worth more than Earl's car. Just then Blake stands up and tells everyone in the room not to worry because he comes prepared as if he's a Boy Scout, adding "a Boy Scout that's a handsome professional backpack model with his own condo." Earl tells Blake he can take care of Joy himself, and she says he's just jealous. He high-pitches that he's not, but just wants to protect her. She asks what he has to protect her with and he digs in his pockets and finds a piece of gum and a corndog stick. She's horrified he'd carry around the corndog stick. He says there's still some corndog stuck on it, but it's not ready to be eaten yet; still too hard.