One of those ladies was Catalina Rhona Aruca, "Camden County's first hot immigrant," who was born in Guadalatucky, Mexico, and came to Camden in a box. Another of Ernie's women was daytime hooker Patricia Michelle Weezmer, our Patty. Apparently, Patty's half-Cherokee, and she spent part of her childhood on a reservation before her mother divorced her father, Chasing Squirrel. Patty sells her body during the day and stars in local community theater at night. Nice! [Since they used a bunch of real cast photos for this episode, I wonder if that dramatic, black-and-white photo was a shot from an actual play actress Dale Dickey was in. - Zach] Patty and Camden talk about how great Ernie was. They sort of dated him as a team. He would watch Catalina dance, get worked up, then take Patty into the parking lot. Again: Nice!

Geraldo says everyone thought Ernie would be there forever, and they were right... if by "forever" they meant April 9, 2001. Stuart (still a cop then) fills us in on the details of that day: Pretty quiet morning. A lady officer named Lisa had brought in some pumpkin cream cheese and bagels. Then the 911 phones started ringing. Joy calls first: She went to the Crab Shack and no one was there. She thinks they're pulling a scam. Darnell calls to say his boss is missing. The 911 guy thinks that sounds like a good thing and laughs. Randy prank-calls. Officer Jeff, who is way orange, explains they don't look for people in the first 24 hours, because they usually show up on their own. And they don't look that hard after 24 hours, because by then, they're usually dead. Stuart asks if Jeff's wearing makeup. He says he's not, but we all know he's lying. He says they started to suspect murder. Stuart wipes Jeff's makeup off, and Jeff admits it's makeup, because he looked terrible on Cops. Wait, was the first Cops that old? I'm confused by this show's timeline, or lack thereof.