My Name Is Earl

Episode Report Card
DeAnn Welker: C | Grade It Now!
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Snitching Pays!
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This episode opens how every episode used to end: with Earl and Randy sharing a bed in the hotel. Randy wakes up and tells Earl it's two days until his birthday and wonders if Earl got him a present yet. He also tells Earl he is old enough to finally go by his proper name, Randolph. Earl informs him that his name is Randall, and Randy's upset. He doesn't even think Randall's a real name, but he knows Randolph is because of Randolph Hitler (sic). He thinks Randall sounds so strange that his mom and dad might as well have named him "Pork Chop Hickey." As you might expect, it turns out Randy likes this name and would like Earl to start calling him that, but Earl refuses. There's a pause, and then Randy says, "Good morning, Earl." I found that confusing. Like, were we supposed to think he was sleep-talking that whole time and just woke up? Or does Randy just wake up talking and then realize he forgot to say "Good morning"? And what's the point of that, writing-wise? Just to confuse me? If so, well played, Earl writers. Earl sighs "Good morning, Randy."

Earl has put a lot of thought into Randy's gift and is giving it to him two days early because it's too big to hide in a closet. It's a car. But not just any car. It's a Ranchero, which is far superior to Earl's own El Camino. We know this thanks to Catalina and then Earl telling us how great it is. (If you knew this on your own, you know far too much about cars with pickup beds and should be ashamed.) Catalina reminds Earl that for her birthday he gave her a "Happy Bat Mitzvah" mug, but that was just because he thought it said "Happy Birthday" in Spanish. We learn that Earl's crossing number 213 off his list this week. Is that the highest we've ever gone on the list? Maybe it's a recent addition? Anyway, the list item is "Never let Randy have anything better than me." Flashback montage: They stole some coats, and Earl gave Randy a ladies' fur shoulder wrap and kept the leather jacket for himself. This totally works, because all Earl has to do is tell Randy the shoulder wrap is for guys and Randy's all smiles. (This is presumably before last week's valuable life lesson.) Then Earl takes the girl in a neck brace who's not saving herself for marriage and gives Randy the girl who is saving herself and wants to talk about the Lord. Finally, they move in to the hotel and Randy gets the side of the bed with the bloodstain. And this is not just any bloodstain. It's HUGE, like someone was killed. In fact, I wouldn't even sleep on Earl's side of that bed.

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My Name Is Earl

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