As they approach the Bookmobile, Randy wonders why he can't have a puppy. He swears he can do all of the things a responsible pet owner would do, including hitting it in the head with a shovel when it's bad. Nice. I'm sure the Humane Society and PETA would approve. They get to the Bookmobile and a long-haired Raynard comes out growling at them. Earl says, "Raynard?" and Ape Man Raynard runs back in the Bookmobile. Then present-day Earl continues reading Trazan because, get it? Raynard is Trazan. Or Tarzan. After a commercial break, Earl's still reading about this creature who looks like a man and acts like a beast.
Then we're back in the almost-present past, where Randy and Earl are trying to figure out what to do with Raynard and the Bookmobile. Randy suggests lighting the Bookmobile on fire with Raynard inside, but Earl says no. He thinks this might all be his fault. And it turns out it was. We jump back even farther into the past and Raynard shows up at Earl's, where he's with a pregnant, hormonal Joy. Earl and Raynard whisper at the door, because of Earl's crippling fear of his even-meaner-than-usual wife. But even thought they're whispering, she appears from the bedroom, wanting them to stop their "chitter chatter." She claims she's working really hard to grow a baby and all Earl's doing is standing there having a party. We then get emotional Joy (a rare and awesome sight to behold), as she cries that she could be growing something really important today, like "his brain or his weiner." And then she goes to get a glass of Chablis. Awww, what a good mom. Raynard asks if he can stay with them for awhile, because he's asked everyone else he can think of, but Earl has to say no because of Joy. (In Joy's defense, Earl actually never asks her.) Earl sort of owed Raynard this one since he let them stay at his place. Raynard leaves sadly. Then Joy yells from the bedroom that her water broke. Oh, nope, she just wet the bed. "Come clean it up."
Raynard then wanders around, according to Earl's voiceover (how does Earl's voiceover know all of this stuff anyway, since Raynard isn't speaking human yet, and Earl wasn't there when this happened?), until he comes across the new Bookmobile (actually a "Book-mo-bike") and steals it. It reminds him of the stranded Bookmobile, where he heads to live. In the almost-present, Earl tells Randy he has to add Raynard to the list, because they didn't let him stay there. Randy wants to blame Joy for being so mean when she's pregnant. And when she isn't. Earl thinks they could have tried harder, so puts him on the list. He tries to get Raynard to come out of the trailer by saying they all stole the Bookmobile together. He gets him to come out, and Raynard talks like a caveman: "No one speak me." Randy thinks it's cool he figured out how to talk using less words and tells him "Me like you talk." Only Randy would think this was an improvement. Raynard loves living out here, but Earl wonders how he eats, and Raynard runs to get them food. He comes back with "his hot wife, Charlene," a raccoon, and some berries. Earl recognizes the berries from when they used to go camping, and Joy would hallucinate, thinking the bottom of half of her was a horse. Then she hit Earl in the head with a stick, thinking he had a "Freak head!" Earl wants to take Raynard in a car to get a pizza. But Raynard then sees the same freak heads on Earl and Randy and runs away.