My Own Worst Enemy

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Mindy Monez: B | Grade It Now!
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Two Grand for a Hoochie Dress?
Cut to Henry on the ground in Mexico, sitting pretty surrounded by his parachute. He consults his Edward message, which consists of Edward mocking him for the weak pinky stunt, followed by the mission details. Edward tells Henry it's taken him years to gain Gael's trust, and that they have to take advantage of that because MI-6 is about to take him down in an "armed sting in Bogota." They'll do this by purchasing his Russian nuke for six million dollars. He also tells Henry to try his best not to be so Henryish, hilariously concluding with, "Gael is probably the one person less interested in what you have to say than I am." Hee. Henry puts his comms in and checks in with Janus, taking care to pretend to be Edward in case Trumble is listening in, which of course he is, and Henry's ride arrives to take him to Gael.

Trumble briefs Raymond on his mission in the Janus conference room. He shows him a photo of Theresa Chu, a woman who was having an online romance with Dietrich. The day after Dietrich disappeared, she quit her job, which is apparently a giant clue of some sort. Tonight she'll be on an evening flight from Vancouver to Honolulu, and Trumble instructs Raymond to go there and track her in case she leads them to Dietrich.

Oh, and the heartbreak begins. Tom's wife arrives at her Portland hotel room all excited about surprising him. He hasn't checked in yet, but she's all "Oh, he's probably just at dinner with clients! This is going to be the most romantic night of my life!" I am not at all being sarcastic when I tell you I'm crying my eyes out over this.

Vancouver airport. Raymond is being awesome, as usual. He's posing as TCA security so he can steal Theresa Chu's cellphone SIM card and replace it with a dummy one. She gives him a look like, "I totally know you just stole my SIM card," and Raymond shoots back a "Yeah? What are you going to do about it, shortstack?" look. I love Raymond.

No! My heartstrings! Tom's wife is all decked out in brand new lingerie waiting for him in Portland. She calls the front desk and they confirm he still has not checked in. Then she calls his cell, which goes straight to voicemail. She's so disappointed and confused and hurt. I can't take things like this.

Henry arrives at Gael's gorgeous Mexican bad guy compound. Mavis tells Henry via comms that they won't let him in without being searched. Oh, and search they do. Gael puts on a giant blinking oven mitt... thing and waves it around Henry. I think. I dunno, I'm laughing pretty hard. The oven mitt detects Henry's comms, and Gael removes them. Henry gets nervous and says, "I can explain!" Gael just shrugs and says it's OK, Henry does his job and he does it well. Then he takes out a giant gun and shoots his henchman in charge of checking for comms in the head, saying, "and he did not. Let's go inside and have a drink!" Henry's terrified, but thirsty. Onward!

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My Own Worst Enemy

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