Props to the Wingster. The Winganator. Wing. And the Sarstress. Writing some recaps.
Go. Now. Go.
We're in an unfamiliar room, and a female voice drifts in: "Brian, honey, are you ignoring me, sweetheart? If you are, that's okay. Just tell me." It's time for a new abbreviation, because as we pan over to Brian Krakow playing with his telephoto lens (his actual telephoto lens, people -- ew), we are regaled with an unfamiliar voice providing the narration. It's Brian's voice, so I'm going to go out on a limb and call it BVO: "My mother's a behavioral psychologist." A man's voice similarly invades the Sanctum Krakonium: "Bernice, if you left him alone, maybe he'd break out of this prolonged latency." BVO: "And my father's a Freudian psychiatrist." (Mom: "Our child is not in latency." Dad: "Keep living in denial, Bernice.") BVO: "Which basically means that they fundamentally disagree on, like, everything." (Dad: "Brian, is everything all right?" Mom: "Feel free not to respond!") What a nightmare. Brian already makes a lot more sense.
Meanwhile, we see what we no doubt already suspected, which is that Brian is using his high-powered zoom to stalk Angela. He is, in fact, scoping her out through her window as she walks around in a snazzy robe. Which is closer to pathetic than to creepy but, the longer this goes on, the more that balance will shift, until Brian will need to go to prison. Where, let's face it, he wouldn't stand a chance. BVO: "At Angela's house they probably, like, laugh. And eat unbalanced meals. And talk about things that don't have deep symbolic meaning. They're probably this, like, normal family." Uh-huh. Normal like a three-eyed fish, Krakow. Normal like you, and your creepy-ass zoom lens.
To illustrate Brian's implied misconception, we cut to Chase Place, where Danielle is being tortured. Actually, she's having her hair brushed, but she does scream, "Child abuse!" Oh, she'll be sorry when Patty actually starts smacking her around, and none of the villagers believe her, and all chortle, "That's the girl who cries 'Child abuse!' Pay her no heed. Pass me a flagon of ale. Hey, did you catch the footrace today? I lost a bundle betting on that lazy fucking hare."
Aaaaanyway, Graham and Patty are looking for wallpaper in the basement because Graham is going to wallpaper the bedroom. Supportive as ever, Patty says, "You're actually going to wallpaper the bedroom?" Graham wants to know what the big deal is. Patty says, "Nothing. Except this wallpaper sat here through the entire Bush administration." (My heart just stopped. Someone please tell me that that's the only Bush administration anyone will have to sit through, ever. Please?) Graham says, "I figure, since I'm not working, it'll keep me off the streets." Patty's concerned that Graham doesn't know what he's doing, because in her world Graham has no skills and requires her guidance constantly. He assures her that he can wallpaper a room. Fake Patty smile. I'm bored by the wallpapering subplot already.









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