Nashville
Nashville

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Good Luck in Atlanta, Douche

Cut to Juliette and her band practicing "Boys and Buses" at a soundstage with arena set up. Sean walks in at the end of the song, and Juliette runs and jumps on him, giving him a big kiss. I swear, Hayden Panettiere must stand about 2'9". She introduces "my wonderful, handsome...Sean" to the band, then tells them to take five. Sean has come to deliver good news. Or, "good" news. He called the rehab facility where Jolene is staying, and it turns out tomorrow's a family day. They're scheduled to visit at 11:00. Juliette takes this news about as happily as you'd expect. Monster-In-Law told Sean that Juliette said she really wanted him to meet Jolene. Still working all the angles! Juliette explains that she and her mom have a very complicated relationship, and she should probably take this one alone for now. Sean is amenable because he's way nicer than his mom.

Meanwhile, Avery and Scarlett are having post-coital times. When he says, "That was..." she finishes the statement with, "...Never our problem." Her ratty weave sex hair is hilarious, as you might have predicted. He gets a calendar alert on his phone and says he has to go since Dominic wants him back in the studio today. Avery asks Scarlett if she wants to come to Atlanta. Secretly of course she does, but declines, adding that JT and the boys in the band must be over the moon about the deal. Avery has to admit that they're now, instead, under the dumpster. He claims it was not his choice, but this does not appease Scarlett's woodchuck rage. She gives him grief for being selfish and hurtful to the innocent, then tells him, "You leave your keys and get out," in exactly the same voice in which she asked, "Did you sleep with that woman?" which means she is serious. Scarlett is wearing the bedspread at this point, which makes it even harder to take her seriously.

And then we're at rehab! Jolene totally looks NOT cracked out! She's combed her hair and everything! She says that seeing Juliette reminds her what she's working so hard for, then asks if Juliette read her letter. Juliette bluffs that she's not here to talk about the letter, but rather to impart good news: she's getting married. In a big church wedding, just like they always used to talk about while Jolene was serving Juliette 4C iced tea mix for dinner. Jolene does not have the elated reaction that Juliette was expecting, and instead says it's not right. And that's nothing personal about Sean, it's something personal about Juliette. Jolene says that maybe Juliette has a hole so deep inside of her (that's what he said!) and she knows that because she also has a hole deep inside of her (that's what... ew). And if Juliette thinks that vows to a stranger is going to fill that up, she's got some heartache in store. No amount of marrying is going to quiet her demons. Juliette doesn't take MethMom's therapized preaching all that well (and, I mean, she did make the transition from pink macaroni to sweater-wearing wise elder quite quickly), and says that Jolene just can't stand to see her happy. Jolene then asks if Juliette IS happy, and Juliette storms out in response. Now that is the action of a happy woman.

Nashville

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