Meanwhile, a blonde girl runs up to Rayna's bandleader, Deacon Claybourne, and hugs him. It's his niece Scarlett, who is a huge fan of Rayna's. She's moved to Nashville and is working at the legendary Bluebird Café, which Rayna calls "the Mecca." If you ever do go to Nashville, do not be fooled by the fact that the Bluebird is in a strip mall -- it really is wonderful. Rayna hasn't seen Scarlett since she was a little teeny tiny thing and -- spoiler alert! -- Rayna was banging her uncle. Scarlett is a poet, but she introduces her boyfriend, Avery Barkley, who is, in fact, a songwriter. Stupid songwriters. They're always crawling out from some hole, asking you to listen to their feelings and validate them. As a songwriter, I am allowed say this. Scarlett has worshiped Rayna since she was a little girl and though her face is structured in such a way that it would seem impossible to get any words past both her cheekbones and her teeth, she makes her adulation quite clear. I have a feeling this may come in handy in future episodes! Rayna tells her not to hesitate if there's anything she can help with, because Scarlett is family.

And then it is time to meet Juliette Barnes. She's sitting in a chair having lip gloss applied as her assistant mentions appointments in New York with Good Morning America and Vogue. She also has to approve a perfume bottle for her new sure-to-be ungodly smelling fragrance. A few months ago I got a sample of Taylor Swift's perfume in my Birchbox and made the grave mistake of spraying it on myself before throwing it in the trash. It was the olfactory equivalent of her singing "Rhiannon" at the Grammys. The prototype bottles are filled with water, and Juliette says that she can't choose one without smelling the perfume, which is our immediate clue that she's a real dumb-ass. The assistant then answers the phone and reports that Juliette's mom is on the line. Juliette shoots daggers from her eyes. More daggers. She pretends like she can't hear her mother on the line, hangs up, and then tells her assistant that it's part of her job to ensure that mommy dearest does not get her number. The assistant had just changed the number, but Juliette tells her to change it again as she throws the phone in the trash. And the assistant must have spent so much time bedazzling it to Juliette's specifications!