It turns out that Sloan set Will up with Carrie. She asks Will how the date went as they prepare for broadcast the next night. MacKenzie expresses an interest as well, and Will covers the mic so she can't hear about how Carrie brought a loaded gun into Will's apartment. "Are you going out with her again?" Sloan asks, dreading all the phone calls Carrie is going to make to her asking why Will hasn't called. She begs Will to at least stay out of Page Six for a while. "She's super-jealous. You haven't seen the crazy side of her," Sloan says. I don't think it's possible that we haven't seen the crazy side of a woman who's had more than five seconds of airtime on this show. Will is annoyed that someone as supposedly smart as Sloan could have made such a stupid matchmaking choice. "You have two Ph.D.s!" he says. The hell? Two Ph.D.s? Isn't she 32? And both Ph.D.s are in economics? Why? How? Ugh.
The show ends, and Jim tells Maggie he feels like they're still "nibbling around the edges" when it comes to reporting on the economy. I don't understand. Surely Dr. Dr. Sloan should be able to get right in there. But we're probably just going to have to wait until NewsNight tackles Occupy Wall Street and we all get lectured on how the media is ignoring this righteous cause except for the geniuses at NewsNight. Episode Six, y'all! Maggie asks Jim how his date with Lisa went. "Fine," Jim shrugs. But he "doesn't think" there will be a second date. Maggie is happy about this.
Will has yet another date, who wants to know what the deal was with Will and Nina in that Page Six article. Will tries to explain his mission to civilize and how Nina is a horrible person for writing about a real housewife. It turns out that Will's date is a big fan of The Real Housewives of New Jersey and therefore can't wait to read Nina's article. "Brittany's a bitch!" Date No. 3 concludes. "No, you are," Will says. And it's time for another lecture. You see, Brittany may have signed up to be on a reality show (or not, since she's not a real person unlike most of the other people this show mentions), but the rest of us are "being turned into a bunch of old ladies with hairdryers on our heads" by subjecting ourselves to these reality shows and gossip about said reality shows. That's right: society will be ruined and not civilized if we all turn into old ladies with hairdryers. It's the worst thing that could possibly happen. Thank god Will is here to save us from this.