Dr. Dr. Sloan does... something. I'm not sure what.
Don tells the room that Obama has taken much fewer vacation days so far than Reagan or the second Bush did at this point in their terms. Why does Don still work for NewsNight, by the way?
Maggie runs into Will's office with quotes from various founding fathers that she found in her fifth grade history book. By the end of the night, she looks like a hot mess with all of that running from her desk to Will's office while holding a single sheet of paper. MacKenzie tells her to go home and get some rest. "You look terrible," says the guy who just left the hospital early; "I've never seen you look so bad." HA HA HA! I love Jeff Daniels. Even though he's on this show. Maggie responds to this by tripping over Will's trashcan on her way out.
Maggie meets Lisa for dinner. Don was supposed to be there, too, but he bailed and left Maggie a text telling her to come to his place "around midnight." Maggie says Don's just working really hard for the show he doesn't even work for, but Lisa says it makes her sad to see Maggie with Don. "In a year you've gone nowhere," she says; "it's hard to watch you." "IT'S HARD TO WATCH YOU!" Maggie manics so loudly that it disturbs other diners. Lisa asks what she means by that, and Maggie hesitates for just a second before saying she thinks Jim came to see her and not Lisa that night. Lisa takes that in, realizes that her only friend in the world is a horrible person, and leaves.
Maggie tries to run after her, but Maggie sucks at everything, so instead she just gets splashed by a passing Sex and the City tour bus. Yes, one of those late Sunday night tours of the city, which can be seen so well when it's dark. The bus manages to throw a tidal wave in Maggie's face, and water splashes on the window of the freaking restaurant. The diners Maggie's shrieking disturbed before giggle at the sight. "Are you fucking kidding me?!?!?!" Maggie screams. Boy, I'll bet Sorkin was positively giggling to himself when he wrote this delightful scene. He probably thought that it was the funniest thing ever to be shown on TV and that sitcom writers had nothing to complain about because their jobs were so easy.
The Sex and the City tour guide shows everyone Carrie's apartment. Whoever lives there must hate that tour, driving around on a Sunday night with the theme song blasting out of the open-air second floor. The guide says Carrie lived "the typical life of a single woman in New York City." Maggie responds to this by being her usual demure self and screaming at everyone while overacting with every muscle of her body. Maggie says she is a single woman (no, she's not -- she has a boyfriend) and she doesn't wear heels to work and her job doesn't pay well so she just spent her last seven dollars on dinner with her "best friend" whose boyfriend she is in love with. Oh, and of course it turns out that Jim was on the tour and heard everything! Is anyone surprised by this development? No. We all saw it coming from miles away, like a loud huge open-air Sex and the City tour bus. Jim stares at Maggie with his mouth hanging open as usual.