Kenny Rogers: You've got to know when to hold 'em (when to hold 'em)...
Recapper: Don't waste your voice, Kenny. These kids are... OMG, what have you done to your face?
Kenny Rogers: I went into this, in depth, with People, years ago. Have you been living under a rock?
Recapper: La la la. Can't hear you. Can't see you. Have crawled back under my nice, comfy, PROTECTIVE rock.
At the restaurant...
Stephanie: Well, it looks like your Recapper is having some sort of crisis. Since I'm super-fast, let me blaze through this. We have reservations, but the hostess is telling us there's a 45 minute wait. I hate to wait, especially now that I'm super fast, so after being condescended to by Ginger, over there, I speed up to the desk move our name to the top of the wait list, and some other poor sucker's name down to our slot. Jim and I are feeling pretty proud of ourselves, until we realize the schnook whose spot we took had made reservations, so he could propose to his girlfriend. Overcome with guilt, and having a soft-spot for young lovers on our anniversary, Jim and I give up our table, which should have been the young lovers' anyhow, and we go to a nearby hotdog stand.
Jim: As we walk around town, we come across another fire. And I spot -- Sparkles -- is it?
Nice, Comfy, PROTECTIVE ROCK: Yes, that's right. Continue, please.
Jim: So I tell Steph to call 9-1-1 and tell them we've spotted a suspect, and then I make her promise to wait right there, while I run off after Sparkles. I'm really not comfortable calling him Sparkles. Will you please come up with a different nickname?
Nice, Comfy, PROTECTIVE ROCK: No!
Steph: I think Sparkles is kinda cute. The name. Not the guy. I mean did you get a gander at him? But that's not what's important here. Jim, you missed the best part.
Steph: Oh all right, I'll tell it. So Jim makes me promise to wait right there, and we all know that's code for "follow along later and save me" and when he takes off, he hands his hotdog to a firefighter! He's all like here, buddy, you're not busy. Crack me up.
Jim: I do no such thing. I throw the hotdog in a nearby trashcan.
Steph: Are you sure? It totally looks like you hand it off to a firefighter.
Nice, Comfy, PROTECTIVE ROCK: No, he's right. I watched it again. But I thought the same thing at first, Stephanie. Now let's get this show on the road.