This show is in a holding pattern. It's entertaining enough, but is doing nothing to make me crave more. This week is just like any episode in any nondescript procedural, and by the hour's end, nearly everything is wrapped up in a neat, moralistic bow. If not for the likable performances from the cast (and my paycheck from TWoP), I might have cashed out by now. That said, the previews for next week imply the story is about to heat up, so I'm still holding out some hope that the writers will attend a Julie Plec/Kevin Williamson master class on the art of set up and reveal. In the meantime, let's plow through this week's episode. You ready? Okay.
Jim dons a black hoodie and goes on patrol in Franklin Park to crack down on a rash of muggings, only to find there's another vigilante out there, and he's shooting the bad guys. While the cops don't consider the vigilante a priority, Jim does. He continues patrolling Franklin Park, mostly to make me yearn for Buffy, but also in order to get mistaken for the violent vigilante and thus bring "conflict" to this episode. Deadboy-Dad, the real vigilante, is a guy whose son was killed with two gunshot wounds to the head, in Franklin Park. Or is he? Yeah, he totally is, but we have to pretend he's not until the bitter end, because Deadboy-Dad's primary role is to serve as Jim's morality tale o' the week, namely: Don't get so caught up in your newbilities that you lose the plot at home. Eventually, Deadboy-Dad is busted (as in shot by the cops) with no assist from Jim, and we all yawn and live happily ever after.
This week, we learn Jerkface's name isn't just Francis, it's Francis Chiles, which makes me miss Rupert Giles, and possibly yell at Julie Benz to be Darla, but I digress. Francis now has a toe in on Stephanie's research, and mistakes her work on her family's abnormalities for old research conducted by some scientist who "disappeared" from the face of the earth after making a shocking discovery that can be tied to Stephanie's wonder-plant. Dun dun dun.
Meanwhile, JJ uses his math ability to learn how to play football (it's a trajectory thing), but Professor Dick is still suspicious, so he tells the Powell parents that he thinks their boy is on academic-performance enhancing drugs, which -- what would that be, like Adderall? JJ insists he's clean, but keeps hiding the fact that he too has newbilities. Also, Daphne uses her telepathy to learn the location of an exclusive party, but she's still a big loser. The cool kids want to bounce her, but when they run out of booze, she tries to blackmail a store cashier into selling to her, by reading his mind and threatening to expose him for raiding the cash register. He calls both her bluff, and the cops, so Jim and Stephanie have to come pick her up and ream her out.
I'll be back tomorrow with the full weecap. In the meantime, join the discussion in our show thread, and BYOB.
Watch the episode below, then see why this show seems so familiar.
Want to immediately access TWoP content no matter where you are online? Download the free TWoP toolbar for your web browser. Already have a customized toolbar? Then just add our free toolbar app to get updated on our content as soon it's published.
True confession: every time I see this episode's title, I first read it as: "No Ordinary Vagina." I don't know how or why. I'm not that girl. But it happens every single time. I have to shake my head and blink my eyes before I see "Vigilante," which has been staring at me all the while. And thank goodness for that. While I might cheer on a vigilante vagina under the appropriate circumstances, I do not want to see one in action. Speaking of action, let's get to the story, yeah? Okay.
Night; Exterior: Jim patrols Franklin Park. Back in the lair, George describes the park as "The only place in the city where you can get poison ivy, crack and sexually assaulted, all at the same time." So like an open-air mall, then. Over the Bluetooth, George asks how the "costume" is working out. Jim pooh-poohs the "costume" notion. He's only wearing the black hoodie, and not the $37.00 real-hair mustache that George gave him. Well played, Jim. When the guys' ensuing secret-identity argument is interrupted by a screaming woman, Jim up-up-and-aways over the trees and to her rescue. He hollers at her mugger to leave her alone, so the mugger turns his gun on Jim, which maybe should be a tense moment, but isn't, since we all know Jim is relatively bullet resistant. Apparently, the mugger is not. Someone shoots at him from the tree line and he's down. Now Jim has to decide between rescuing the bleeding mugger, or pursuing the vigilante. He needs more of a Scooby Gang, so he doesn't have to choose. No surprise, he rushes the mugger to the hospital, dumps him in a wheelchair waiting by the entry, and pins a note to his chest: "Save me -- then arrest me! I mugged a lady in Franklin Park." Don't worry, nobody will run a finger print analysis on the note. It will be forgotten as quickly as the poor mugging victim, who has probably died of a coronary in lonely, dark Franklin Park. Hey, how else are they going to keep her from placing Jim at the scene?
Powell Pad; Morning: Stephanie super-speeds through kitchen clean-up, which bugs me. Maybe it's because she's in such a small space. Maybe it's because she lives with three other able-bodied people who could empty the fricking dishwasher since Mommy has to go to work. Maybe it's because I'm just jealous. Jim announces he and JJ are going camping, and they make plans to go shopping for gear. Their conversation is interrupted by a news report of the mugging. JJ gets all excited thinking dad was the vigilante mentioned on the news. Jim denies it, since he didn't shoot anyone. When he's alone, Steph gives him crap for lying but he maintains he wasn't lying since he didn't shoot anyone. Stephanie doesn't want him to worry the kids and she doesn't want them emulating him, so she sneers that at least, he ought to try to stay off the news.