No Ordinary Family

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Cindy McLennan: C+ | Grade It Now!
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No Ordinary Very Special Episode

Global Tech: At work, Katie takes Jim's side. "I don't get it. You used to complain that Jim didn't have anything in his life. Now that he finally has a thing, you're going to complain about that?" That doesn't give Stephanie any pause. "I was hoping it'd be a hobby, like model airplanes or stamp collecting." Katie: "Oh, trust me, you do not want to be with a stamp collector. Their fingers are sticky, and their tongues are always dry." Hee. They get a little concerned about security (and Stephanie's family mojo research) when they find the inner door to their lab is ajar. Steph tells Katie to call security, but the intruder is only Jerkface a.k.a. Dr. Francis Giles, who is here to gloat that he's their new lab partner on the wonder-plant project. Katie offers to call security anyhow. Perhaps my Katie-love is tiresome, so I'll try not to mention it all the time, if you promise to remember I love her like chocolate.

Store: Daphne, Megan and Nameless Friend are at the convenience store, gossiping about Bailey Browning's exclusive party. As lowly sophomores, they'd never be invited. Daphne seems pretty zen about that until she reads the store clerk's mind (he's just stolen 50 bucks from the till) and realizes she might be able to read Bailey's mind and find the party.

Precinct: Jim presents Detective Cordero with his sketch of the vigilante. Cordero is underpaid and over-worked, so he's not really concerned about catching the guy who shot the meth-head who was robbing an innocent woman. Back at the lair, Jim bitches to George about how the cops just don't care. George thinks that, like the cops, they ought to prioritize. Jim can't do that. He can't rest knowing there's a vigilante running willy-nilly through the town. George pretty much says, "Other than you." Jim is not amused. Ooh, it's their first lovers' quarrel. Jim storms out of the lair, taking George's door with him. Ooops.

School: Professor Dick is still giving JJ shit about being a good student. JJ's friend, Declan, waits at the doorway, amazed that JJ got a B+. "Seriously man, whatever you're on -- can I get some?" Professor Dick overhears and makes the dickish assumption that JJ is on something.

Football Bleachers: Jim calls JJ to beg off their plans to shop for camping gear. This is about when I start seeing the formula for this episode pop off the screen, like JJ's magical math. Ooh, look at the colors! JJ doesn't care, because he's seeing more magical math -- down on the football field. His brain has instantly decoded football. Ugh. The only thing worse than watching football on TV is hearing someone explain it on TV. Please don't go there, Show. Anyhow, you know where this is going, 'cause you see the pretty colors, too. Scrawny little JJ, who may be smaller than my 11-year-old daughter? He's gonna go out for the football team. He's going to get laughed at. He's going to get mocked, but he'll make the team. He'll make the team, save the game, and he and his big burly dad will reconnect, and can I go to sleep now? No? Fine. Be that way. Commercial.

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No Ordinary Family

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