It's Jim and Stephanie's anniversary, so they leave their untrustworthy spawn home alone, while they take off for dinner and an overnight date at a hotel. The problem is, they don't leave Jim's cellphone behind, so George calls every five minutes trying to lure Jim into chasing a fire-starting super villain, whom we'll be calling Sparkles. Jim resists George's siren song, but when he and Steph happen upon a fire and Jim spots Sparkles, the Powells pair up to fight crime. Unbeknownst to our lovebirds, Sparkles is Dr. RevCam King's monster, and is doing his bidding. When Jim knocks out Sparkles, the cops find and arrest the fiend, but have to bring him to the hospital.
Jim takes Stephanie to George's lair and they plot to bust out Sparkles when he's transported to the precinct, so that he doesn't burn down the whole town. Once he's free, Steph will sedate him and run blood work, to determine his kryptonite, and then disable him permanently... or that's the plan. Said plan falls apart, because Dr. King has Will running interference for Sparkles, too. Will frees him by flipping the paddy wagon that's transporting him, right before the Powells get to him. While Jim drags the unconscious cops out of their wrecked ride, Stephanie races after Sparkles. He's not too slow, himself, and nearly manages to set her on fire, but Jim comes to the rescue. It all ends with Sparkles being doused (and killed) by sand or dry cement mix, or something. With the mood ruined, the Powells return to their pad and their delinquent progeny.
In the B-plot, JJ invites some bullies to his house for a poker game, because he's trying to win enough money to buy some super-duper computer. He thinks he can beat them by using his super-brain, but in the end, he has to drag in Daphne and her psychic abilities. The bullies are brash and base, but JJ is finally winning. But then Katie and Will show up to check on the kids and put the kibosh on the game, because while there may be gambling in Casablanca, there is no gambling in CasaPowell -- at least not on Katie's watch. Will subtly uses his abilities to mentally prod the bullies to blow (and to snoop around the Powell Pad), but Katie believes she's all commanding and authoritative, which is cute, because she's Katie.
There's a whole big pretense about whether Katie will tell Stephanie how naughty the niños have been, but when Will gets a call from Dr. King and has to beg off their date, Katie cuts a deal with Daphne: read Will's mind and see if he really has to work or if he's just losing interest. When Daphne tries, she gets nothing but static, so she lies to soothe Katie's ego, and to get her out of the house. Then there's the whole other big thing with the kids busting the marble sculpture Jim made for Stephanie, and them breaking into the school to repair it, and paying off the security guard with the poker winnings. Also Francis gets fired from Global Tech and Dr. King punishes Will for not saving Sparkles, by withholding his secret serum, but I'll save that for...
...Tomorrow, I'll be back with the full weecap. In the meantime, grade the episode up top, and then please join the discussion and poker game, down in our show thread.
Jim: George, why are you with me while I'm buying pre-anniversary roses for my bride?
George: I think the writers have decided I should suck.
Jim: Well, lately buddy? You do, so hear this: when Steph and I celebrate our 18th anniversary, nothing -- not the kids, not the lair, not criminals and not your pesky phone calls -- are going to screw it up.
George: Look, there go fire engines and police cars. You should go throw yourself into a towering inferno right before your anniversary, just to see if you're fireproof.
Jim: Up, up and away!
George: [to audience] What? He didn't say anything about fire.
Jim jumps into the burning building and saves a little boy. Our super dad is so super cool, even his clothes don't burn. Since this happens more than once in this episode, and I'm trying to stop flames from shooting out my ears, I'm fanwanking it thusly: super-sweat makes clothes fire retardant. Anyhow, after Jim hands the kids over to a firefighter and refuses medical assistance for himself, he notices a super-creep in the crowd. Since the show isn't one for suspense, I see no need to maintain a false sense of same. That creepy looking guy right there, that's our arsonist. He's a fire-starting super-villain, so we shall call him Sparkles.
At Global Tech:
Stephanie: So Katie, now Jim is flame-retardant.
Katie: That's good, since you're so smoking!
Stephanie: Your girl-crush wears on me, but it does provide me with the opportunity to impose upon you all the time.
Katie: It's a win-win situation. Or it was -- don't look now, but here comes Francis.
Francis: I'm here to provide dramatic tension. Will I actually get a look at your work and realize you're analyzing a tissue sample from your super-hubby, or will I just sneer and snivel?
Stephanie: Sneer, snivel and then slither out.
Bullies: Hey JJ, you 90-pound weakling, we shall call you a girl and put your books up high where you can't reach. Fear us. That is, provided, that Michael Oher isn't in this episode.
Michael Oher: MY NAME IS KENNY. AND NO, I'M NOT.
Bullies: Very well. Now we'll walk across the hall and talk about how we have to cancel our poker game.
JJ: Excellent! My parents are going out. Thank you for such a convenient opportunity to snooker you into financing my plan to buy a super-duper computer that can keep up with genius-me. I keep a pin-up of it in my locker, and sometimes when I look at it, I have to hold my books in front of my pants.