Hollywood Homicide

Episode Report Card
Keckler: C- | Grade It Now!
L.A. Whore-y

At Liz's place, Don takes off articles of, well, not quite clothing, just accessories -- gun, watch, pocket change -- and complains that Logan definitely knew more. Liz comes into the room and takes off her shirt. This all seems like an overly decorous way to have sex. Maybe they're just getting ready for bed. Liz tells Don to forget about the obnoxious manager. Don sits down to take off his shoes and asks how Colby's doing. He's fine. "Yeah?" Don presses. "Focused?" Liz says rather edgily, "I said he did fine." Don leans forward questioningly. "What? If you want more, talk to him yourself," Liz snaps. Don boggles. Liz goes on, "It's hard enough to get respect out there when they all know we're sleeping together." Well, you're not doing much of that now! Don stands up and galumphs around, making irritated noises. He sarcastically thanks her for her help. Liz protests, but then her phone rings. It's Logan. He needs to talk to her, but if he says anything, everything will come apart. Liz tells him to calm down and asks what he means. Logan is standing outside of his car. It's night and he's parked at an overlook, so he's pretty much dead in t-minus-five. Don has emerged from both the bathroom and his pout and is looking questioningly at Liz. Liz says she's coming over to the house, but Logan says he's not there. He's in a turnout, and he tells her where. "It's all just gone too far, you know," Logan says. Liz says she'll be there in a few minutes. And he'll be dead in a minute because -- check your clocks -- yep, we are at the thirty-minute mark!

Don and Liz arrive and don't see Logan or his car. Liz suggests Logan went home. Come on, Liz! Don't you watch this show? They NEVER go home! Because they are both over the ridge and dead. Liz lifts up Logan's very bloody hand. I'll let it go this time because you're relatively new.

At the site, crime-scene photos of Logan's blood-streaked face are shot. Colby is heard saying, "Single shot, like you saw. Pretty much straight on through and through to the left hand." "Okay, so he saw the gun and probably raised his hands up as a shield," Liz extrapolates. "Yeah, a lot of good that did," Colby notes. You know, to shoot once and kill someone, you either have to be a good shot and know it or just think you're a good shot. I mean, those not that familiar with using a gun as a deadly weapon would seem to fire repeatedly to make sure the target is down and killed. It's usually the pros that get away with a single shot. Unless they're close enough to press the barrel of the gun to the head and be pretty assured of a kill. But that didn't happen here because 1) Logan had room to instinctively throw up a hand between his head and the gun, and 2) there's no scorching on the forehead where the bullet went in. If the barrel had been held to the head, there would've been scorching. Everything I know about murder I learned from Agatha Christie. Colby asks why Liz didn't call him when she got the call from Logan. "Because I was with Don," Liz says reluctantly. And by "with" she means "in the Biblical sense." And by "Biblical sense," she doesn't mean that they were having sex, but that they were arguing like Moses and Zipporah after Moses admitted to taking shrooms before seeing the whole Burning Bush laser show. Basically, the romance has gone out of Don and Liz's affair before we really got to know Liz at all.

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