Hollywood Homicide

Episode Report Card
Keckler: C- | Grade It Now!
L.A. Whore-y
Chez Eppes. Liz and Colby walk in. Liz hands Logan's laptop over to Amita and thanks them for helping out. Charlie claps Colby on the back and then grabs Colby's hand and pulls him in for a manly half-shoulder-hug, saying, "Really good seeing you again, man!" "Charlie was really worried about you for awhile. We all were," Amita says, and there's an inflection in her delivery that almost sounds like she's reproving him for errant behavior or something. Odd. Charlie brushes that comment off and says, "Yeah, but you're back here and you're a hero, man, and it's all good." Charlie frantically pats Colby on the back again just as Alan rushes in from the kitchen with a French press, saying, "Hey, there you are -- is that Colby? That's Colby!" He grabs Colby's hand and pumps it, grinning, "It's good to see you, I mean it!" I know they all liked Colby, but it's almost like they're overcompensating for doubting his allegiance in the slightest. "I can't tell you how happy I was to learn you're still one of, you know, the good guys!" Alan goes on. Colby shuffles uncomfortably. Meanwhile, Amita has pulled up the files and determined -- with knowledge that doesn't come from being a mathematician -- that Logan was sending movies to Tracy. Alan waxes nostalgic about how time was, you took a girl OUT to a movie, but now you email them? What is the world and generation coming to? I don't know about emailing movies, but since my old-age impatience can't handle cell phones, talking, or even food chomping around me at a movie theater, I'd rather Netflix everything. The movie Logan was emailing is called Breaker's Edge. Amita has seen ads for it, but it's not out yet. Alan wonders how Logan could have been emailing a movie that's not even out in the thee-ay-ters yet. "Well, pirated DVDs are a huge industry -- the FBI has a whole section devoted to that," Colby explains. Do they have a section devoted to bittorrents as well? I'm just wondering. For no real reason. Honestly. Amita next looks for a digital watermark, something the company who produced the DVD would have hard-coded so that any piracy could be traced back to a source. Just as long as it's not a dirty cartoon watermark that makes you lose lots of paper business. Amita discovers that the watermark shows the DVD was issued to Brett Chandler.

David and Megan have returned to the Melrose Madam, who doesn't understand why the FBI thinks she would know anything about such sordid affairs as piracy. David shoots back that nothing goes on in her House that she doesn't snatch a percentage of. Megan explains for us that, as a big star, Brett had a steady supply of pre-released movies. His dead friend, Logan, was emailing them to Tracy. Now they want to know what Emily was doing with them, because she certainly wasn't starting up Movies Without Pity. The Madam tries to deny knowing anything about what the girls in her "legal dating service" do in their spare time. David tells her that if she's not helpful, they could suddenly find a reason to look more closely at her "legal dating service." Finally, the Madam coughs up the names of two brothers in Hollywood, who run a club called Bedouin. Do you think the brothers actually know what a "bedouin" is, or just think it sounds sexual? The Madam requests they keep her name out of it. "Yeah, we'll be real discreet," David says, wryly. "Oh, yeah," Megan says with the same sincerity.

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