Numb3rs

Episode Report Card
Keckler: B+ | 1026 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
Saving Agent Granger

Back on the boat with a Real Evil Genius, Colby waits. "'Scuse the camera," Kilmer says, a bit mincingly, as he takes white towels off his tray of torture. "I can't remember things like I used to." Kilmer then goes on to do that thing master criminals do on TV and in movies, which is share far too much information about themselves. Kilmer was born in Beijing and absorbed into "an extensive training program," just after he learned to talk. He snaps on some rubber gloves. It cracks me up how torturers are always so concerned about the sterility of everything. Like, does it really matter the instruments of torture are dirty when you are about to use them to produce, you know, severe pain and discomfort? In fact, psychologically, I think it would be more effective if the instruments were left all cruddy and gnarly, with the remnants of the previous victims' blood still on them. Not that I think about torture or anything. Kilmer goes on that he was sent to the U.S. to be assimilated and he was even pre-med before he "followed [his] path" into government service. What is with that '60s-era golf shirt, Kilmer? You look like Christopher Walken in Blast from the Past. Colby is secured to the chair with plastic cuffs. Kilmer goes on that Kirkland died before he could answer the "important" questions, like, "Does the FBI know Kilmer's name yet, and if he goes to D.C, will he be arrested?" Kilmer ties a rubber band around Colby's bulging bicep and flicks his forearm. Wouldn't want to be digging around Colby's arm for a vein or anything. Too painful. Kilmer loads up a syringe with a bottle of something as Colby suggests he just ask Carter those questions. Kilmer ignores that and says they will start with something simple, something he already knows, like Colby's op name. "Arabian Nights," Colby responds. Kilmer looks at him reproachfully. "Stalking Horse," he corrects him. I don't even want to know how he got that op name or if it has anything to do with "hung like a." Kilmer smacks Colby's forearm again and leans over to inject him, saying, "Lesson number one: you can't lie and I don't bluff."

Charlie visits Larry at the monastery. He's struggling over whether or not to give Don the solutions he's asked for, because he's not sure they'll produce the "right" outcome. Larry waxes philosophical about fatalism and science transcending function and fact as they follow the path in their search for higher truths. I'm going to be drinking a lot as I recap this show, aren't I? Charlie smiles that he made that same point in his "Intro to Game Theory" class yesterday and then takes off after apologizing for interrupting Larry's meditation. Larry says that he's come to realize that you can contemplate silence, but you can never find it. Larry could have learned that just by reading Eat, Love, Pray and skipped all the chanting and hair shirts.

Numb3rs

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