"God, these gloves are so tight I feel like OJ." Zoey says that's the third time he's cracked that joke -- is this also a diabetes thing? -- and he's all, "Oh, like your material's fresh. Are you wearing eyeshadow?" She says no, but she is, and asks how it looks. Sam says she looks nice, and she goes, "Back off" before twirling away in her chair. It's awesome. Akalitus brings by Coop's plaque with the magazine cover, and Zoey's jaw drops amazingly. Everybody's shocked, except for Sam, who immediately figures out that Coop's got a publicist. Coop stares and doesn't know what to do, and it's amazing, and Akalitus is totally unimpressed, so he finally asks her to take it to his office for him. That does not go well.

Zoey runs to Jackie and they laugh about the publicist, but Jackie stops smiling when she says it was Sam that figured it out. Sam knowing private shit about people, in addition to his rehab? He really is just Jackie Kryptonite. If she had balls they'd migrate. Well, she... You know what I mean.

Eleanor's got an EMT in the ER who has screwed up her middle finger on a gurney. "It's too bad. I had a long list of people I was gonna flip off. I guess I'll have to wait." Heh. Eleanor bitches about Americans and their lists, jerking the lady's hand around until it hurts so bad she almost passes out. She admires the woman's manicure, which she got at her sister's salon, and Eleanor's like, "That's what I'm talking about! Word of mouth, not some poxy list!" She finally jerks the fingers back into alignment so abruptly that the lady nearly throws up. Safe to say Eleanor's bedside manner has gone onto a list of its own today. The whole scene is visceral and mean and sour and funny and bright, but it's weird to see Eleanor treat patients any other way than usual.