Emotional processing looks, to us, like going to a well without water and hoping you'll never be thirsty again; the flipside is that sometimes a lady just wants you to listen without fixing: To me, the craziest request of all. Not to mention the fact that it insures we'll be having the exact same conversation in a week or two, which itself drives me bonkers. Anyway, Thor has feelings and they don't matter to Jackie, which is satisfying to see her say, because my God these gays with their endless needs, and these men with their endless needs, and I've got feelings and needs and drama aplenty of my own.
Gloria has recruited these two strongest soldiers in her army, of course, to steal some statues from the recently deconsecrated chapel before they're shipped off to Staten Island. ("Ooh, yikes," snarks Jackie.) The one that Gloria loves the most, a Virgin Mary, she describes thus:
"She's tall. She's got a lot on her mind. And I relate. Also, she's not judgmental. That's something I'm working on. It's irrational, but that's the nature of faith. We're stealing her."
Such a great episode. What an enjoyable, tight, heartbreaking, hilarious thing.
Fitch bores his moms with about a million photos before they can get him to sit down for brunch. To review: Swoosie Kurtz is the Julianne Moore, and Judith Light is now playing the Annette Bening role originated by Blythe Danner. They both look like about a billion dollars, of course; I never really noticed how truly lovely Judith Light was until Ugly Betty. (Especially in violet, which she'll be wearing in a minute.) Judith picks and picks and picks, and Swoosie hems and haws and mumbles and holds off, but they finally get there:
Judith: "We have news we don't want you to get all dramatic about. Deal?"
(Hushed sidebar with all the drama of counsel at a murder trial.)
Coop: "You guys are so cute! What is it?"
(Obviously they are getting divorced.)
Judith: "...Annnnnnnnd there goes the chin."
Eddie's cracking wise about pilots with Tunie when Gloria enters, stomps through the pharmacy, and installs the Virgin Mary in what used to be Eddie and Jackie's secret rendezvous spot. Left alone with Jackie, Eddie shoots for contrite and just ends up naughty-little-kid: "She called me, all right? She's out at the airport, she's bored, and I..." Jackie shakes her head: This is how she sucks them in. And of anybody in Eddie's life, Jackie would know. How it happens to him, how it happens to everybody; how it is done.
Poor little Fitch has paddled himself in a little boat out into the middle of a lake and is refusing to talk. Finally he pipes up:
Coop: "Fine! This is bullshit!"
Judith, fiddling with her Bloody Mary: "If he's just going to sit in that little boat and curse, I'm getting a cab."
Boys and their drama. He shouts across the lake -- people staring, Swoosie blushing -- that Judith is leaving Mom for a somebody named Dina who, as it turns out, is her basically straight business partner.
Coop: "...You were straight too once, remember?"
Swoosie: "Honey, your mother and I love each other very much. We just can't bear to be in the same room together anymore."
Coop: "Dina. Dina? How ridiculous!"
Swoosie, as Judith makes a panto uh-oh face and slurps away: "...How straight is she?"
When Jackie gets back from the Pharmacy, Lou's sitting in Admitting. It's not good. I don't know that I have much to say about it. Here comes the chin.
Jackie: "Lou, are you all right? You know you were discharged... Do you need somebody to walk you out?"
Lou: "No, I left, but I... I went home, and then I came back again. I... I uh... I keep falling. Not literally, but -- well, that too, but -- I feel like I'm gonna do something stupid..."