Coop asks if he got mugged by a midget, and Zoey tries to correct his usage, but he's all, "Sorry, Little Nurse Jackie," and she informs him that this is "very much a compliment." Coop recognizes the boy from his beloved Quiznos, and the kid rolls his eyes with the muttered oh, of course of somebody who is just fighting his way through a haze of pain to remember why Coop's face fills him with awkwardness and dread. "Meatball sub, lightly toasted!" Of course Coop is now in love with the kid, because he loves recognizing people because that means they relate to him in some way, which makes them important.
"Tell me how this happens to a man," Coop says very seriously, and the boy explains that he has Tourette's, but "not the yelling kind," which would suck. Zoey's like, "You have the really great stabbing yourself kind?" He explains that normally he just hits himself, rather than stabbing himself, usually around girls. How great would it be if Coop just started punching himself all the time? I would watch that show. One hand on a boob, the other hand balling up into a fist.
Coop totally identifies with Cute Quizno's Boy, but stops himself before admitting that he too gets the tics when he is "overwhelmed" by women, and the entirety of the nurses -- Zoey, Thor, Sam -- who are standing there (for some reason) stare and wait for Coop to admit his issues, and finally he clams up all, "We're gonna stitch you up and get you out of here in no time, Chief." I wouldn't say I'm disappointed, because you know later on Coop is going to crush on this kid some more, but the nurses seem a little let down.
Jackie offers the girls fruit rollups and pretzels, and mentions that the pretzels are intended for Fiona's carsickness, the existence of which she disavows. Jackie's like, "Well, sometimes you get carsick," and Fiona swears she will not, because today is special. Grace is still trying to figure out why. Jackie tells them that they're having an adventure, and they're off to see "what the day brings," and Grace responds by telling her that fruit rollups are not heavy on the fruit content. "As a matter of fact, yes, I did know that. I was trying to poison you."
Grace complains that it's not funny, although the idea of anybody poisoning Grace makes me laugh, and then Kevin makes some kind of fmurr fmurr fmee noise with his face, and Jackie leans back and does that thing she does where she implies the apology or explanation, then pulls back without having explained or apologized, forcing you to fill in the blanks without giving anything of herself: "Oh my God, I needed this. I'm sorry, honey, it took me so... Whatever. We're here, and we are doing it." Therefore, we are all going to pretend that this is the only thing that matters, like the whole world doesn't exist and it's just them, in the car, and the countryside, and her dental floss thing of drugs. Which has now vanished.