I am so SICK of those VW ads with the Nick Drake song. It's selling a CAR, not a mood. What's next, a freaking Valium ad with a Belle and Sebastian song? If so, please kill me now.
Ricky and Sip are interviewing the Reticent Bartender. He says that Pat, the DOA, "liked to chase tail," and that he "witnessed Pat and Angela doing it on top of the bar." Lovely! Then he asks if Dino "The Rat" could be covered from reaching out to whack Pat since he's already plea-bargained a sentence. Ricky says that plea-bargain just covers crimes already committed, not new crimes. The reticent bartender suggests they look at Dino, the "cheese-eating scumbag." See? It's good to open up!
Baldwin is calling Lt. Abner's house, with Fancy perched on his desk awaiting results. Baldwin hangs up without having spoken to anyone. Fancy says, "I know he has a machine, I've left messages." Baldwin goes, "Yeah, and if he has a dog, it's driving him crazy." Well, if he has a dog, you should TALK TO IT! That's what machines are for! All my friends leave my dog little messages when they call. For all I know, when I'm out he calls them back! It's like driving by a bunch of cows; if you don't stick your head out the window and yell "moo" at them, you probably don't have a pulse. So, say "woof" or "good doggie" then next time you're calling someone who lives with a dog. I bet David Milch loves dogs. Anyways, Fancy says he's gong to go by Lt. Abner's house to check on him.
Paul (the Rapist) comes into the station house. He leans on John's desk (and John is rocking a totally excellent orange turtleneck) and says something about getting a call because his car was in an accident. Di and Kirky roll up and he tells them TWICE that he knows his car wasn't in any accident. I bet he doesn't need to buy any real estate in Florida either, but don't let that stop anyone from trying! Paul falls for things. So Di and Kirky lead him to an interrogation room to start busting his nose.
Once inside the interrogation room, Di and Kirky drop the bomb that there is in fact nothing wrong with Paul's car, and, that the land deed he holds is a fake. It's about Shanice. Paul starts groaning, "Oh hell. That bitch is lucky I'm not filing a complaint about her stealing my neck chain." Di loses it and screams, "Try not calling her a bitch Paul. It makes us think you've got anger toward women." Yeah! Paul clams up and says, "I wanna talk to men detectives." Di snorts and Kirky tells her to take it easy. Di says, "I don't have to listen to that crap." You said it! Then Paul says that not only does he want to talk to a male detective, he wants to talk to an African-American. Di snorts again and says, "Oh, he only talks to a brother." Kirky just says, "We'll see," and they leave Paul to hang out with the big chip on his shoulder.