Woo hoo! Nudity and adult language! And it isn't even my birthday!
Previously on the show, JB rats his fellow skels out to further his singing career (Ricky says he sings doo-wop like Dion), but goes back on heroin for whatever reason and gets tossed on his ear by Ricky. "Beat it," he says. I say, that's a Michael Jackson song, not Dion.
The funky keyboards start, and we arrive at a fancy apartment with lamps the size of Barbie Dream Houses. They're almost as pretty, too. Sip and Ricky cruise in and get the lowdown from the uniforms: "Home invasion." It seems the husband was kidnapped and, later, three black men used his keys to get in and locked his old lady in a closet. Now her speech is slurry and the daughter's having a conniption fit. There's an old guy in his faux Resevoir Dogs getup (black suit white shirt black tie whoa-oh) on the phone; he's the seventy-year-old home security guy hired by the daughter. Sip wonders if he can get off the phone anytime soon. He obliges and says he used to be on the job too: "Twenty-two years, in traffic duty in Brooklyn." Sip gives Ricky a look that says, that is SO not gritty, NOR critically acclaimed. The fiftysomething redheaded daughter appears, and excuse me, isn't this just like last week's episode, with the snooty rich art people and the redheaded beeotch? I though so. Do you think the writers are trying to draw a line between hard-working, honest cops and other working people and the mean, manipulative rich people of the world? A big, thick, giant line? Me too. At least we all know whose side we're supposed to be on. So the older redheaded daughter claims that an Avery Birch is responsible for the abduction of her father, and asks whether they're looking for him yet, and adds that she's not taking her mom to a hospital. "You'll have to talk to her later," she snoots. But her speech is slurry, they say. I gave her a Valium, she snoots. And she's scared: "What if I take her in and she doesn't come out?" It's not like a hospital is a labyrinth, or a glue factory, lady. You'll get her back one way or another. Sip says there has to be an EMS transfer for the slurry-voiced mom. She asks her security dude if this is true. Those seem to be "the current regs," he says. The redheaded beeotch (RHB, for short) says, "Do you think this Avery Birch did it?" No, but you sure do, RHB. It's too early to tell, says Ricky. The RHB goes to get her mom and Sip looks all owly. Yup, more rich snoots to put up with! Enjoy!