Off the Map

Episode Report Card
Joe R: C- | Grade It Now!
My Anaconda Don't Want None Unless You Got Respect for the Locals, Hon'

After the break, Ben is clarifying that the ring only went into his leg when they tourniqueted with the canvas, not when the snake wrapped around him. Which makes this all Lily's fault, because she wouldn't let him finish when he was trying to talk back in the river. Ben, to his credit, isn't the one making this dumb argument, she is. "I was wrong," she tells S-B (and Ben, and us). "It was protocol, but this isn't the ER, this is the jungle. And anything you want to say to the one you love, you say it." Oh, brother. So they bring Yappy in and hold off on the surgery until they bring Yappy in and he proposes to her. And not just a quick "Willyoumarryme?" but, like, an extended, talky lead-up to how he wants the rest of their lives to be date night. Not a single doctor objects to this, not even Mina. Finally, Yappy accepts the proposal, they haul her outta there, and the surgery can begin.

Plastics is back building the latrine when Charlie approaches him. Plastics gives him some well-deserved shit for bailing on him today, and Charlie delivers the news that Cole sweet-talked Papa into giving Sofia the pills as part of a healing ceremony. Plastics is all "Whatever, at least she won't have epilepsy anymore," but Charlie says it won't matter, she'll still have the scar. Plastics laughs at Charlie and his dumb demon-fear, until he has an idea. He once again bolts into the jungle, until he reaches Papa at his herb garden. Still waiting for Cheech to make an expression. I'm sure it'll happen! Papa hands Plastics a bag of herbs to start -- for his head injury, which Cole mentioned resulted from Plastics being dropped on his pretty plastic head a bunch of times as a child. Plastics laughs it off, then says he's come here to ask Papa's permission to treat Sofia and her "demon issue." Papa scoffs at young doctors like Plastics who think they have all the answers. Blah blah, "You've been at this three years, I've been at this 300." Blah blah, "the jungle is the best pharmacy in the world." He says a doctor can't treat successfully if his patient doesn't believe in the cure. Sofia wouldn't have taken the pills because "she doesn't believe in you." Plastics: "Not a lot of people do." Oh my GOD.

Surgery. They're closing up Snake-Bait's leg wound, and they're stable enough that Dr. Ben suggests Lily go re-dress her snake bite that's started to bleed through. She says she wants to see her patient through surgery, though, and at that moment, Snake-Bait goes into cardiac arrest. The doctors scramble and chatter as to the cause (toxins from the muscle damage that were kept bound up until now, of course)!. He's got no pulse! Commercial!

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Off the Map




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