Mark comes out and interviews that the pitch was bad. He tells another contestant that he sucked, but then he interviews that at least he finished, and he hopes he isn't going home tonight.
Chelsea breaks in to say that the judges were in for a long day. We start with a montage of people who got the priest idea: Max is a bitter Jew who's joined the Catholic church. No, an evil priesthood has taken over the world. Then someone sees a gorgeous black drag queen. No: "Like Tootsie in a church, without cross-dressing?" And it is a musical. Chelsea VO says that the pitches went from bad to worse. Ramsey Mellette of Aurora, CO -- still on the priest -- has sent his protagonist to the melon aisle, where nothing good has ever happened in any movie ever. A girl comes up, they compare melons, they go home and have sex, there's a cute montage of them getting ice cream (Fisher is dubious, but so far this seems to be Ratner's kind of picture), but then things get weird; Melon Girl has morning sickness, she's projectile vomiting (Ramsey kindly offers a sound effect), but then it isn't actually morning sickness: the woman is possessed by the devil. Marshall sighs. Ratner laughs at the sigh. There's a stereotypical Irish priest who tells the novice to marry the girl, and he agrees, but he needs a crash course in exorcism. The exorcism gets a lot of detail and colour; the girl recovers, and she still loves the would-be priest. Ramsey finally stops, and Fisher looks straight at him, shaking her head no. And mouthing no. And...kind of audibly saying no. As she should. Ratner says that the pitch sounds more like a Saturday Night Live skit than a movie. He leaves. Marshall wants someone to pitch lunch.













Comments