Once and Again
Letting Go

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Letting Go

Later that night, Judy is sitting in Lily's kitchen while Lily makes dinner. Lily thanks her for "helping with Grace." Judy says it was the other way around. Then she asks about Rick and Lily gets all smiley and starts gushing how, she knows they haven't been together that long, but...Judy looks at her knowingly and says, "You want to marry him, don't you?" Lily admits that, if he asked her, she wouldn't be able to say no. Jeez, is the ink even dry on her divorce papers? Are there even divorce papers? What happened to standing on her own, for the first time in her life?

The doorbell rings, and we hear Zoe exclaim, "Daddy!" Apparently Jake's abandoned his habit of just barging in whenever he feels like it. Grace walks past him in the foyer without saying a word, and he follows her upstairs to her room. "Okay, now you listen to me," he says, like he's going to scold her into forgiving him. Good plan. "You're going to have to learn to deal with this. I'm still your dad," he reminds her. Grace responds by letting him know that she's figured out the real reason he was late last year for her parent-teacher interviews. He tries to deny it, but she storms, "Don't lie to me!" and, with his primary means of communication barred, Jake is left with nothing to say. Grace rolls out the evidence: He had wet hair, and she knows now that all the times he had wet hair and said he was playing racquetball, he was cheating on Lily and showering to cover it up. She tells him that he didn't just cheat on Lily, that he betrayed all of them, and he can't "just fix it" like he wants to.

Downstairs, Lily, Judy and Zoe sit and wait. Judy comments on how every action creates these "ripples" that affect other people. Her epiphany seems to be complete.

Cut to Judy's apartment, where she's letting Sam in while her voice-over talks about how her life has changed since she lost her father, using a road/car metaphor that I just don't have the strength to repeat. Basically, with her father gone, she has no one to follow and she's got to make all her decisions alone. To Sam, Judy says that she can't be with him anymore, no matter how much she loves him, and he can't be with her. They're not free. She says he's got to make a decision. Sam takes a second before saying he doesn't think he's ready to do that. With her eyes brimming, Judy says she knows that. I think he's waiting for her to crumble and relent so things can go on as they are, but she doesn't. Yay for Judy! When Sam sees that Judy's not about to cave, he shakes his head, mutters, "Oh man," and pulls on his jacket. Put down the freaking collar! I scream. I gave him the benefit of the doubt last time, thinking the collar must have been accidentally raised, but apparently he lifts it deliberately. He's so 1986 right now I don't think anyone would have second thoughts about heaving him to the curb. And he tops it nicely by saying that he and his wife have been together so long, and "it's very complicated." Judy gives him no response -- she just stands there looking at him (just keep looking at that collar and you'll be fine, I tell her). "All right," he says and finally leaves. Judy's alone in her apartment with the Sad Guitar, and she picks up the childhood picture she'd settled on for Sam. Young Judy comes to life, talking about the kind of man she wants to marry. Oddly, "adulterer" isn't on her list of qualities. Judy looks at her younger self, remembering her ideals, and knows she did the right thing as we fade to black.

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Once and Again

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