Cut to Booklovers, where Jake is showing some new girl around the coffee bar and giving her advice. She asks where they keep those "cup-holder-y things," and makes a circle of her hands. "Sleeves," Jake says slowly. He points to the bottom shelf. The very bright girl bends over in front of him, offering a lovely view of her backside. Jakey likey. Tiffany wanders in with Maddie the baby in her arms, and catches Jake ogling the girl. Rattled, Jake asks what they're doing there. Tiffany reminds him that he agreed to watch the baby while she goes to yoga. Maddie draws the attention of the new girl, who comes over to gush. Tiffany introduces herself and asks just who in the hell she is. "Oh, this is Nina," Jake says quickly. "She's the new...new..." "Barista," Nina offers helpfully. She says it more like "brrreasta," though, which seems fitting since both of hers are unabashedly on display. Tiffany dashes, and Nina asks whether Maddie is Jake's baby. He snuggles the baby's head and confirms that she is. He sees an in and asks if Nina would like to smell Maddie's head. "Why would I do that?" Nina asks, eyeing him suspiciously. Jake doesn't have an answer for her. He just knows it's something chicks like to do. He thinks fast and says that babies' heads smell good. She agrees uncertainly to whiff and draws back immediately, offended. She suggests the baby might need changing. Jake sniffs the baby's bum and agrees, grabbing the diaper bag. Eli, who's been admiring the new barista and her brrreastas, comes rushing over, and offers to help show her around. How very conscientious of him. Despite Eli's strung-out eyes and pasty skin, and the hedgehog clinging to the top of his head, Jake agrees it's a good idea to leave him alone with the girl. "So, what do you want me to show you?" Eli drawls, trying to decide between his favorite smoking stall and the birthmark on his inner left thigh. Brrreasta manages to keep a straight face and says, "I don't know. You tell me." Eli decides to show her how to clean the filters, which could be just about the filthiest euphemism I've heard in a long time. She beams and declares the idea "groovy."
Jake glances up from Maddie's diaper and witnesses something just as stomach-churning: Nina affectionately fiddling with that stupid lock Eli wears around his neck. Jake sees himself in Eli and blanches. The resemblance is uncanny, really. Similar hair, similar shirts, similar smarm. Jake's days as the reigning Snake are numbered, and he knows it.