Cut to Rick's office, where he and Sam are putting together their corporate gifts. Sam says incredulously, "You offered to cut off your penis?" Rick looks up from the gift card he's signing and says, "Incendiary and medically incorrect." Sam states the obvious: "You're a better man than I," adding, "But soon you'll be less of one." I doubt that's possible. He chuckles exaggeratedly while licking an envelope. If ever there were a time for a paper cut...

Over at the radio station, Lily and Judy are wrapping presents, too. Judy's wearing one of those horrible holiday sweaters with a big Christmas tree in the middle of it. I can't believe that thing would ever hang in Judy's closet. "Isn't that incredible?" Lily gushes. "I didn't even have to bring it up, he just offered." Judy's not so easily impressed. "Well, he should offer," she says, her pigtails waving indignantly. She points out that men have it much easier than women, not just regarding reproduction, but in ending their capacity for it, too. She's particularly bitter about the fact that their reproductive bits don't have best-before dates, like women's do. She gripes, "It's like multiple-partner sex-party-till-you-drop." I'm not sure what having viable sperm has to do with having sex till you drop, but whatever.

Rick explains to Sam that because he and Lily are "done with the kid thing, there's nothing left to lose." Sam disagrees, grunting, "Maybe it's a primal male thing, but I like to know I have swimmers carrying my DNA, even if I never use them." Do us all a favor, and don't.

Judy informs Lily that the surgery she'd have to have is "way more dangerous" than Rick's. Amazingly, this is news to Lily. Judy says that in spite of the risks, more women have their tubes tied than men have vasectomies. "Because men don't want to go there," she mutters. She adds, "I just don't like the idea of you having to be grateful for something that, really, should just be a no-brainer." Go, Judy! Lily looks thoughtful.