Once Upon a Time
The Crocodile

Episode Report Card
Cindy McLennan: B+ | 14 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
Hook, Line and Sinker

Storybrooke. Present. Charming goes to Snow's apartment to ask Charming for help. Charming tries to beg off. He's got another overly busy day, thanks to all the havoc wreaked by the Chintz Monster Rumpy summoned, but Rumpy is nothing if not polite and persistent. He hands Charming the missing poster and tells him about Belle. When Charming asks if this is the person who Rumpy once confessed to loving -- the one he said was dead -- Rumpy confirms she's one in the same. He thought she died, and oh my word, he's already the Dark One. Does he really have to play the Exposition Fairy, too? I guess the show is still new enough to attract viewers who might want back story, but that's why God makes DVDs and recappers. I'm going to gloss. Rumpy can't use the tracking spell he gave Charming because he has nothing belonging to Belle. He is not too proud to use Charming's own loss of Emma and Snow to enlist the acting sheriff's sympathy. We cut to the...

Enchanted Past. Dawn. As ever, I am not your action recapper. Rumpy and Jones meet at dawn and begin their duel, but it's pretty difficult to duel with a magical being. I'd feel worse for Jones had he not once challenged the limping, cowardly cuckold merely to humiliate him. Rumpy plays cat and mouse with Jones for a few, but then disarms him. On his knees, the pirate looks up at the Dark One and says, "Go ahead, I'm ready for the sword." Rumpy holds the blade to Jones' neck and leans over him and says, "No. Do you know what it's like to have your wife stolen from you -- to feel powerless to stop it? It feels like having your heart ripped from your chest. Actually, let me show you." Rumpy reaches into Jones' chest, as Cora will one day to do Daniel, and Regina will one day do to...sob...Graham, and clutches his heart. The magic crackles as Rumpy squeezes Jones' heart.

Milah appears and shouts at Rumpy to stop. I guess he didn't know Jones was lying to him, because he's clearly shocked when he says, "Milah?" We cut to commercial. No Pitt. After the break, we flash forward to...

Storybrooke. Present. In some workshop or back room, somewhere (maybe Game of Thorns, I can't tell), Smee shoves Belle down onto a chair. When she asks who put him up to kidnapping her, Mo walks in. "Belle?" Although she's shocked to see her dad, it's a happy shock. She rises and runs to his arms. They embrace and cry with relief. Mo breaks the clinch to apologize for finding her in quite this way. "Please understand, I had no choice. [...] After the curse broke, I searched all over for you, and discovered the Dark One still held you captive." He is shocked when Belle sets him straight on the fact that she chose to be with him. She admits that she fell in love with Rumpy, but fears it must be over now. But wait, I need a sidebar.

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Once Upon a Time

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