One Tree Hill
One Tree Hill

Episode Report Card
Ragdoll: B+ | 497 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
My Life as a Cheerleader

After the break, Woda's totally pissed. He's screaming and screaming and screaming. The veins in his head are alive with overworked blood and powered by rage. He yells, "How in the hell am I going to win a ball game with hungover idiots? I don't know why you got on the damn bus in the first place if you weren't going to take this seriously!" The camera cuts to a very contrite Karen and Larry, sitting on a couch, getting their ears chewed off by Whitey. He screams, "And you call yourselves chaperones! It's pathetic!" Whitey's all out of words, he dismisses them with a grunt and a hand wave and grumbles his way out the door. Karen and Larry can't contain themselves anymore. They just start giggling. Wouldn't you? Ah, Woda, you're wicked.

Later that evening, Luke wakes up from a deep sleep to a strange ringing. Nathan's up and playing a video game. Luke looks at the clock and tells Nate that it's four in the morning. Nathan: "If I go to sleep now, I'll never wake up. I'll be a total waste for the game tomorrow." He holds the game up and tells Luke that it's classic basketball. "I'd give you next but you'd probably hurt yourself again." Luke whines, "What is Whitey doing putting us together in a room." Nathan says, "He's just bored and evil." I sort of know where this next comment is coming from, but it's also strange -- maybe Luke's feeling the pressure with Nathan now taking over his world, you know, where Haley is concerned: "You know, when I was younger I always wanted a younger brother. Then I found out about you. Got over that in a hurry." Now, shockingly, it's Nathan who takes the high road: "What you've been doing to Haley. You were kind of a dick to her tonight." Luke squints at him. Maybe he needs glasses. He squints all the time. Oh, right, that's acting. I forgot. Luke says, "You know, she used to be this totally original Haley. Then, you came along." Nathan argues, "As far as I can tell she's still the same person she's always been. The only difference is now she's with me." Pause. He looks over at Luke and retorts, "So maybe the problem's not with her, but with you."

Has morning come this quickly? Right, so here we are at the competition. Welcome everyone! To the corporately sponsored Sparkle Classic! First up are the Bear Creek Warriors! Cue cheerleaders doing back flips. Oh, and chanting: "Bear Creek Warriors! Champions to beat, let's hear it! Better than the Ravens. You'll see!" Heh. Brooke steams. Hey, you know what's different about these girls? Yeah, they're actually athletes with strong legs and muscles and aren't bone-thin like the girls on the Ravens' team. Three cheers for healthy bodies and for this show actually finding some real cheerleaders -- too bad they made them the enemies. Sigh. And they're off. They mix it up. They do the funky funky beat. They wiggle. Roll their arms. They jiggle. They slap their asses and scream, "Bring IT!" And I swear to goodness that if it gets "brought" anymore I'm honestly going to hurl. Girls are lifted up. Girls are dropped. Girls smile and taunt. Oh yeah, and the Bear Creek Warriors kick ass! Sorry, Brooke, but it's the truth.

One Tree Hill

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